You Shall Be Pure
The nature of Yom Kippur is a profound mystery. We know that something powerful and wonderful is happening, but it’s not easy to clearly identify what that ‘something’ is. I think the key to understanding the nature of this extraordinary day is the verse which is central to the Cohen Gadol’s confession which prompts our prostration during Musaf: For through this day you shall have all your sins atoned, so that you will be purified (Vayikra 16:30).
Now, clearly, how one translates the verse affects our understanding of what is going within this forgiveness process. The Ibn Ezra suggests that the true subject of the verse is the Cohen whose Divine service brings about the atonement and purification. Even if that were the literal meaning of the verse, we’d look elsewhere for meaning, because we don’t have the offerings and the Scape Goat today.
One could claim that the forgiveness comes directly from God, Who is the subject of our verse. Or, how about the TESHUVA of the person who sinned being the atonement vehicle?
There are those, like Rabbeinu Yonah of Geronna, who maintain that our verse is declaring an obligation to confess and repent on this august occasion. The Rambam also seems to maintain that there is a special and unique TESHUVA related to the day.
But I’m going to go with the idea that the protagonist and hero of this occasion is the very day itself. This concept fits in well with our widely accepted opinion that on Jewish holidays (CHAGIM) we are reliving the amazing historical events which transpired on the date and left an indelible mark on this date forever. On Pesach we’re really reliving the exodus from Egypt; on Shavuot we are again receiving the Tablets at the foot of Mt. Sinai.
So, what are the events that we are reliving on the Tenth of Tishre? This is the awesome occasion on which Moshe descended again from Har Sinai with the second set of Tablets engraved by God with the Ten Commandments. This is the day upon which our ancestors were forgiven for the appalling sin of the Golden Calf. That awe inspiring event has been etched upon that date for eternity. This date exudes and emits forgiveness. The hero is the day itself!
What is the special nature of this day? Rav Yehuda Amital, late Rosh Yeshiva of Yeshivat Har Etziyon, maintained that the answer to that question is found in the unique form of Teshuva which exists only on this auspicious date.
Before I present Rav Amital’s idea, please, allow a brief sidebar. One of the most common questions I’ve been asked in my career as a rabbi and Jewish educator is: How come I’m confessing for the exact same sins that I confessed for (and presumably was forgiven for) last year. Shouldn’t I be able to move on? Why do I seem stuck in the same spiritual quagmire?
I never really had a good response to this powerful and legitimate inquiry. But I think that the approach of Rav Amital helps us to feel unstuck.
I mentioned earlier that the Rambam posits a unique form and format for Teshuva on Yom Kippur. In the first chapter of Hilchot Teshuva, he lists the four parts of an effective Teshuva: 1. Stop performing the sin, 2. Confess specifically the transgression, 3. Regret this behavior, and 4. Conclude and resolve to never repeat this behavior.
However, when the Rambam discusses the special Teshuva of Yom Kippur he states:
The confessional prayer customarily recited by all Israel is: “For we have all sinned….” This is the essence of the confessional prayer (Hilchot Teshuva 2:8).
How can this be the essence of the ‘confession’, if one doesn’t make a commitment about the future? Easy, explains Rav Amital. The Teshuva of Yom Kippur is radically different from that of the rest of the year. He explains:
During the year, we need to repent “by the book,” we resolve not to sin again. On Yom Kippur, anyone who states “we sinned” is considered a penitent. It is true that this form of repentance lacks a true resolution for the future; however, the great power of Yom Kippur is that even this repentance is effective.
He goes on to explain that to combat sin we must re-accept the Torah (like on the original Yom Kippur at the foot of Har Sinai), which provides an awareness of God’s commands and, sadly, a recognition of sin. For this recognition, it is sufficient to state ‘but we have sinned’.
Again the words of Rav Amital:
On Yom Kippur, Israel’s secret is revealed; their main desire is to do the will of God…The central blessing of the Amida on Yom Kippur ends with the words, “and aside from You, we have no king to pardon and forgive us.” Would we have thought that anybody else could pardon us? The answer is that God not only pardons us, but He descends to the depths of our desires as well. Only God knows that our inner desire is to do His desire. When one says, “However, we have sinned,” he reveals his desire to do the will of his Creator, and wishes to be in the community of penitents, about whom it is said, “Who purifies you? Your Father in Heaven.”
Concerning that last statement, Rabbi Akiva famously stated: ASHREICHEM (you are happy and satisfied), Yisrael. Before Whom are you purified? And Who purifies you? Your Parent in Heaven!!
We are happy and satisfied and spiritually renewed every Yom Kippur by this profound sense that God understands us, and accepts us for who we are. We may stumble and fall and sin, but we still love our God and truly desire to do the Divine Will. On Yom Kippur, we don’t have to commit to a better future. This moment of proximity and intimacy is the goal. And it’s enough.
That’s why we will unfortunately sin again during the year, but not dwell over it on Yom Kippur, because God reads our innermost thoughts and feelings and knows, in spite of our stumbles, that we love and cherish that relationship. So, it’s not great but it’s okay that we have to confess for the same stupid stuff again.
At the end of Yom Kippur when we fervently chant: Hashem, is God! We’re really saying: I’m so glad we had this time together! I can’t wait to do it again next year! I love you, God!