Moshe-Mordechai van Zuiden
Psychology, Medicine, Science, Politics, Oppression, Integrity, Philosophy, Jews

26 tricks for speaking like Donald Trump, and 32 ways on how to defeat him in debate and campaign

Credit where credit is due, the 45th President of the USA is one of the most successful communicators in US history. How does he do it?

1. Think about whom you are talking to (a Trump rally, Congress) and say exactly what they want to hear. Appreciate them out loud.

2. No need to exaggerate anything. You can completely make it up. Inconsistencies confuse only the enemies – which is fun to watch.

3. Saying two conflicting things (even in one breath) is very useful, because later you can prove that you were right, by quoting one.

4. When someone confronts you about a relative untruth, just look pained and full of disdain for having to gaze at a petty hairsplitter.

5. Make sure you always mention plenty of things that make your opponents fume. When people are outraged or spooked, they can’t think as well. Enjoy their negative inapt responses; degrade the protesters. Be macho about having a good fight with loosers.

6. Don’t apologize or be defensive ever. It looks weak. No one likes it. Counter-attack. Turn the spotlight on others. Don’t argue – accuse them of far worse things. It works. Believe me.

7. Learn to speak well. To hell with grammar. Mix long with short and unfinished sentences. Swap fast words with slower ones. Alternate exclamations with soft-spoken words. Sometimes frown and sometimes smile. Vary between “presidential” and working-class style. Move your hands, fingers and that body – don’t stand there frozen. Don’t speak like a bore. Be entertaining and fun. Put the most important points in sentences last and pause before saying them, slowly and in an undertone. Add more emphasis by affixing a few words like: So true; So sad; Pathetic; Believe me; It will.

8. Connect to and interact with your public. Point and smile / attack. Don’t just talk at them as if they were an amorphous dead blur.

9. Don’t try to impress with brainy stuff. Keep it simple. Short sentences, 95% one- and two-syllable words. So good.

10. Coin three-word three-syllable slogans: Build That Wall, USA, Lock Her Up, Drain The Swamp, We Will Win. They don’t oblige. They’re just fun. They empower. They show and build unity in a crowd.

11. Show your power by judging and grading people, calling them bad, good. Your fans would love to receive your personal praise.

12. Don’t listen to critics – fight them. What do they know?

13. Speak directly to the working class men, as if you’re a successful  one-of-them and their representative. “They’re not the elite; we are the elite.” They’ll like you for it and so will many of the working class women. Press all their hot buttons.

14. Most of them know that you are making it up as you go, but as poor people, they vicariously stare at royalty and love fairytales.

15. Speak in simple words of “your” lofty ideals and contrast that with bad bad people who do and want bad, very bad things. Keep it simple: people are either for you and good, or the failing enemy.

16. Make fun of euphemisms, political correct language and ideas.

17. Never make fun of an oppressed group when you have a weaker one that asks for it. So: don’t take on gays; attack transgenders; not the elderly but the crippled; not Blacks but Latinos.

18. After you said that all people are equal you can make fun of as many oppressed as you want – but never blue-color workers, veterans and service men and women (unless they’re trans). Disrespecting others doesn’t work for Jews and intellectuals.

19. For the working class, tone is everything. Words are for smart-asses. Sound as if you enjoy your power and mean it.

20. Only refer to TV, never to written text. Cultivate and flaunt all that the working class identifies with (meat & ketchup, illiteracy).

21. Owning-class style, combine entitlement (golden wallpaper) with being simple (liking ketchup) and speak the same way: as if with a big ego (helped by big money) and simple (helped by dyslexia).

22. Never sound for too long as self-important career politicians.

23. Treat debate lightly, as a football match – may the best win.

24. Use nostalgia: restore our great history, we’ll be great again.

25. When faced with someone who wants to argue you on facts, you don’t have to give them any. Best to flood him with words and half sentences. Intuitive people will get the gist or will like the sound of it, and it will leave intellectuals confused and speechless.

26. Stay on the big picture. Don’t do details. Details are for loosers.

That was fun, wasn’t it? Now, how to win a debate with the Donald:

1. Practice the above points so that he can’t surprise you. Get the method into your system.

2. Never get angry. Reply with mildness, understatements and humor, like: Naughty boy. That was fun, no? We all know that’s not true: you know it, we know it and they know it. You love to play the inconsiderate bully but in your heart of hearts you are plain truly ruthless (say it with a chuckle).

3. Credit him. You have broken so many records; it’s a record how many records you’ve broken. You practically write history while you go. Always full of surprises. I’m sure all masochists love you.

4. Credit where credit is due. You’re such a great speaker. You’re such a good salesperson. I would never buy a secondhand car from you but you’ve a great pitch.

5. Credit him for putting the working class on the political map.

6. Differentiate between lying salesman and cheated customers. We blame you for lying, but your supporters not for liking you.

7. Stress that you know that he’s not a sexist, racists, anti-Semite or Nazi. He’s “just” a complete idiot on bigotry. But his heart is in the right place – just under his wallet. Feel free though to call his reign evil.

8. Don’t treat him like a nobody; that’s how his fans feel. Treat him like a master crook: impressive but wicked. Like watching any top robber, how could we not be in awe of him? He needs to face the consequences of his scheming, but we can’t help admiring him.

9. We all know that much of his critics were just motivated by jealousy. Bad character trait. Bad loosers. We won’t go there.

10. We know that many of your fans just wanted to believe you – not that they actually did for any length of time. They’re not fools.

11. Speak of the goodness, pride, power, endurance and hope of blue-color workers. Mention the middle class too. But the forgotten men and women have just been remembered and conned by a crook – don’t blame or abandon them – again.

12. Speak about sexism, racism, anti-Semitism, adultism and all oppression but connect them to how they are part of a network of oppressions that oppresses workers, exploits them economically. Don’t let anyone play oppressed groups against each other.

13. Try to be proud and strong, not arrogant and don’t pout.

14. Stress the importance of national pride, not as a put down on other nations but as something that unites us. When all working together, we can do the impossible.

15. Be truthful, be reliable and make apologizing look good.

16. Explain by telling stories, or by comparing things to relationships.

17. Sing songs of hope with your crowd; make rallies fun.

18. Be light and funny; use humor, not hate.

19. Learn to speak well. To hell with grammar. Mix long with short and unfinished sentences. Swap fast words with slower ones. Alternate exclamations with soft-spoken words. Sometimes frown and sometimes smile. Vary between “presidential” and working-class style. Move your hands, fingers and that body – don’t stand there frozen. Don’t speak like a bore. Be entertaining and fun.

20. Distance yourself from interests of the rich; speak for the rest. But do invite them to join and become workers – a gratifying life.

21. Explain why to stay away from hurtful speak: it degrades us. The strong take pride in protecting less-fortunates, not hurting them.

22. We must use neutral things only for the positive: nationalism: for pride and belonging, not for festering wars and selfishness; police and military: for safety for all, we honor all those who put their lives on the line, not for brutality; healthcare: for healing all.

23. When the working class prospers, everyone will prosper. Money trickles up, not down.

24. Do you want censured media whose coverage can only be published when it’s found factual? Who should be these honest checkers and judges? Should twitters, speeches and interviews by the president get the same scrutiny?

25. Although a lot is at stake, treat the debate as a football match – may the best win.

26. Say over and over again that the dirty little secret about Donald Trump is that his assignment is to make the rich richer again and the surrounding drama is just fuss and smokescreen to distract us.

27. I understand that honesty may be bad for business but this isn’t.

28. I want to apologies for all the years, decades, centuries, generations that you, the working class and the poor, have been ignored by the politicians. Our slaves were freed and racism is challenged; women got voting rights and sexism is challenged; but most of the political world was comfortable with ignoring your humanity. Donald Trump discovered you, but only to use you to rip you off. No more. The strength of any nation, its “simple” people, is going to be the bedrock of our politics from now on.

29. Life is not always easy. If you like all what a speaker says, he must be lying. Nice statements are not enough – trust must be won. What’s someone’s history that you should trust them? Someone who talks your language can be your pall or a con artist. It’s good if you got suspicious – trust must be won. Check the serious media.

30. You could be fooled because you’re decent. Let’s get rid of the crooks but hold on to your integrity.

31. Don’t ever let any rich or clever guy get away with playing White and non-White workers against each other.

32. I feel bad for decent Republicans being represented by a ruffian.

About the Author
The author is a fetal survivor of the pharmaceutical industry (, born in 1953 to two Dutch survivors who met in the largest concentration camp in the Netherlands, Westerbork, and holds a BA in medicine (University of Amsterdam). He taught Re-evaluation Co-counseling, became a social activist, became religious, made Aliyah, and raised three wonderful kids. He wrote an unpublished tome about Jewish Free Will. He's a vegan for 8 years now. He's an Orthodox Jew but not a rabbi. * His most influential teachers (chronologically) are: his parents, Nico (natan) van Zuiden and Betty (beisye) Nieweg, Wim Kan, Mozart, Harvey Jackins, Marshal Rosenberg, Reb Shlomo Carlebach and lehavdiel bein chayim lechayim: Rabbi Dr. Natan Lopes Cardozo, Rav Zev Leff and Rav Meir Lubin. * Previously, for decades, he was known to the Jerusalem Post readers as a frequent letter writer. For a couple of years he wrote hasbara for the Dutch public. His fields of attention now are varied: Psychology (including Sexuality and Abuse), Medicine (including physical immortality), Science (statistics), Politics (Israel, the US and the Netherlands, Activism - more than leftwing or rightwing, he hopes to highlight Truth), Oppression and Liberation (intersectionally, for young people, the elderly, non-Whites, women, workers, Jews, GLBTQAI, foreigners and anyone else who's dehumanized or exploited), Integrity, Philosophy, Jews (Judaism, Zionism, Holocaust and Jewish Liberation), Ecology and Veganism. Sometimes he's misunderstood because he has such a wide vision that never fits any specialist's box. But that's exactly what many love about him. Many of his posts relate to affairs from the news or the Torah Portion of the Week or are new insights that suddenly befell him. * He hopes that his words will inspire and inform, reassure the doubters but make the self-assured doubt more. He strives to bring a fresh perspective rather than bore you with the obvious. He doesn't expect his readers to agree. Rather, original minds must be disputed. In short, his main political positions are: anti-Trumpism, for Zionism, Intersectionality, non-violence, democracy, anti the fake peace process, for original-Orthodoxy, Science, Free Will, anti blaming-the-victim and for down-to-earth optimism. Read his blog how he attempts to bridge any discrepancies. He admits sometimes exaggerating to make a point, which could have him come across as nasty, while in actuality, he's quit a lovely person to interact with. He holds - how Dutch - that a strong opinion doesn't imply intolerance of other views. * His writing has been made possible by an allowance for second generation Holocaust survivors from the Netherlands. It has been his dream since he was 38 to try to make a difference by teaching through writing. He had three times 9-out-of-10 for Dutch at his high school finals but is spending his days communicating in English and Hebrew - how ironic. G-d must have a fine sense of humor. In case you wonder - yes, he is a bit dyslectic. November 13, 2018, he published his 500st blog post with the ToI. If you're a native English speaker and wonder why you should read from people whose English is only their second language, consider the advantage of having a peek outside of your cultural bubble. * To send any personal reaction to him, scroll to the top of the blog post and click Contact Me. To see other blog posts by him, a second blog - under construction - can be found by clicking on the Website icon next to his picture.
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