A Rabbi’s Rosh Hashanah Confession: I Have Work to Do Too
A Rabbi’s Heart-to-Heart for Rosh Hashanah
11 Personal Resolutions I’m Taking Into 5787
There is a story about a man who came to his rabbi before Rosh Hashanah with a long list.
“Rabbi, I wrote down everything I want Hashem to give me this year.”
The rabbi looked at the list and said, “Wonderful. Now make another one.”
“What list?”
“The list of what you are prepared to give Hashem this year.”
That question stays with me.
Because Rosh Hashanah is certainly a time to ask Hashem for what we need—for health, nachas, parnassah, peace, security and blessing.
But before this Rosh Hashanah, I find myself asking a more personal question:
What does Hashem want from me?
So rather than offering another sermon about what everyone else should do, I want to have a little heart-to-heart and share 11 personal resolutions I am taking into the New Year.
I don’t offer them because I have mastered them. Quite the opposite. These are areas in which I want to grow myself.
Perhaps you will recognize a little of yourself in them too.
1. I Want Hashem to Be More Than a Word in My Siddur
Rosh Hashanah is when we crown Hashem as King.
I say Hashem Melech. But my personal question is: Does Hashem’s Kingship actually affect the way I live?
Before I speak, react, make a decision or judge another person, do I stop to ask: What does Hashem want from me right now?
My first resolution is:
Hashem, I don’t only want to call You my King. I want to live as though You are my King.
2. I Want to Trust Hashem Even When I Don’t Understand Him
This one is harder.
There are things in life I understand, and there are things I simply don’t.
There are disappointments, unanswered questions and moments when we look upward and ask, Why?
I cannot promise that this year I will understand Hashem better.
But I can resolve to trust Him more deeply.
A child holding a parent’s hand doesn’t have to understand the entire journey.
So neither do I.
Hashem, when I cannot understand the road, help me remember Who is holding my hand.
3. I Want to Give Myself Permission to Begin Again
Like everyone else, I carry things from the past.
Things I might have done differently. Words I wish I had said—or had not said. Opportunities missed. Mistakes made.
But Rosh Hashanah reminds me that my past can teach me without imprisoning me.
Hashem gives us a New Year because He believes in new beginnings.
So I want to tell myself:
Yesterday happened. Learn from it. But don’t live there. Begin again.
4. I Want to Become a Better Version of Myself—not Someone Else
It is so easy to compare.
Someone else accomplished more. Someone else has more. Someone else seems more successful.
But perhaps Hashem isn’t going to ask me why I wasn’t somebody else.
The real question is: Did I become the Anchelle Perl I was capable of becoming?
Was I kinder? More patient? More generous? More thoughtful? More committed to Torah and mitzvos?
My resolution is not to become somebody else. It is to become more fully the person Hashem created me to be.
5. I Don’t Want My Relationship With Hashem to Become Routine
There is a danger in doing something for many years.
We know the words. We know when to stand. We know when to sit. We know the page numbers. But do we still feel it?
A relationship cannot survive on autopilot.
So perhaps this year I can put more heart into one tefillah. Learn more Torah. Take one mitzvah to another level. Make Shabbos more precious.
I don’t only want to practice Judaism. I want to experience my relationship with Hashem.
6. I Want to Judge Other Jews Less and Love Them More
We Jews are quite a family. We disagree. We debate. We come from different backgrounds. We observe differently.
And yes, sometimes we drive each other crazy.
What family doesn’t? But we are still family.
So this year I want to work harder at seeing the neshamah before seeing the label.
To celebrate another Jew’s success instead of feeling threatened by it. To remember that another person’s light does not diminish mine.
Less judgment. More Ahavas Yisrael. That is a resolution I need as much as anyone.
7. I Don’t Want My Prayers to Be Only About Me
Someone is praying for health. Someone desperately wants a child. Someone is waiting for a shidduch. Someone is frightened about parnassah. Someone is lonely.
Someone in Eretz Yisrael is praying for safety. And someone whom I may pass casually today is carrying a burden I know absolutely nothing about.
So when I stand before Hashem this Rosh Hashanah, I want to make my heart a little bigger. Hashem, please don’t only remember me. Remember all Your children.
8. I Want to Remember Why Hashem Put Me Here
I don’t believe any of us arrived in this world accidentally. Hashem placed each of us in a particular family, community and generation with particular abilities and opportunities.
The Rebbe taught us to see ourselves as shluchim—as people with a mission.
So I want to wake up remembering: There is something Hashem needs from me today. Maybe someone needs encouragement. Maybe there is a mitzvah waiting.
Maybe a relationship needs healing. Maybe there is one corner of the world that Hashem expects me to illuminate.
I don’t need to change the entire world today. I need to take responsibility for my piece of it.
9. I Want to Be Humble Without Forgetting That I Matter
Standing before Hashem should make me feel small.
But never insignificant. The Creator of the universe wants my prayer. My mitzvah. My teshuvah.My kindness.
My contribution. That is breathtaking.
Humility doesn’t mean, “I am nothing.” It means: What I have is a gift, and therefore I have a responsibility to use it well.
10. Before Asking for More, I Want to Say Thank You
Rosh Hashanah contains many requests.
But before presenting Hashem with my list for 5787, perhaps I should acknowledge what He already gave me in 5786.
Life. Family. Friends. Moments of nachas. Opportunities to help others. Blessings I noticed—and probably thousands I never noticed.
Not everything was easy. Gratitude doesn’t mean pretending that pain didn’t hurt. It means recognizing that Hashem carried us through it. So before saying, “Please give me,” I want to say:
“Hashem, thank You.”
11. I Want to Enter 5787 With Joy, Not Fear
After all the introspection and soul-searching, we eventually have to walk forward. And I want to walk forward with hope.The Hashem Who carried me yesterday will be there tomorrow.
I don’t know everything 5787 will bring. None of us does. But I know Who will be traveling with me.
So my final resolution is: I will enter the New Year with emunah, bitachon, love and joy.
My Rosh Hashanah Heart-to-Heart
If I had to reduce these eleven personal resolutions to one thought, it would be this:
This Rosh Hashanah, I don’t only want Hashem to give me a better year. I want to become a better person for the year Hashem gives me.
May Hashem inscribe and seal us, our families, our community, all of Klal Yisrael and the entire world for a year of gezunt, nachas, parnassah, shalom, security and revealed blessing.
And may 5787 bring us the greatest blessing of all:
A year of redemption. A year of peace. A year of revealed goodness. A year when Hashem is recognized throughout the world.
Kesivah vachasimah tovah. May we all be written and sealed for a sweet, healthy and truly blessed New Year.
