Abraham’s ‘Shadow’ Family- Chayei Sarah 5787
Parshat Chayei Sarah begins, famously, with the death of Sarah. In recounting her life, the Torah teaches that she lived 127 years, and famously uses a word in the plural- chayei Sarah, which can be literally translated as “the lives (not “life” of Sarah)- to denote her lifespan.
Sarah’s own life as described in the Torah has been a whirlwind at times- perhaps it feels like she has indeed led several lives. How did she die? Her death, coming right on the heels of the Akedah, Abraham’s near-sacrifice of Isaac, is famously treated in the midrash as due to the shock of hearing of this event. In our parsha, Abraham proceeds to mourn for and bury her, purchasing the Cave of Machpelah and its surrounding property from Ephron the Hittite.
Abraham, who has wandered for decades with Sarah and their retinue of people and property, finally has land that he can (at least in a posthumous sense) call his own. His own burying of Sarah in that land is an example of chesed shel emet– a true act of kindness, since it’s an act that cannot be repaid.
But curiously, Sarah is not the only wife of Abraham mentioned in the parsha. And Isaac is not the only child mentioned either- far from it, actually! While the bulk of the parsha after Sarah’s death consists of the narrative of Eliezer, Abraham’s steward, traveling back to Abraham’s native land to find Isaac a wife, there is an interesting coda before the Torah tells of Abraham’s own death.
The Torah teaches at the start of chapter 25:
וַיֹּ֧סֶף אַבְרָהָ֛ם וַיִּקַּ֥ח אִשָּׁ֖ה וּשְׁמָ֥הּ קְטוּרָֽה׃
Abraham took another wife, whose name was Keturah.
Who is Keturah? I don’t remember learning about her in Hebrew school. We already know that Abraham possesses (and that is the correct word to use here) manservants, maidservants, and concubines among the coterie in his camp. His first son, Ishmael, is the product of his cohabitation with his concubine Hagar. So why is Keturah, whoever she is, only introduced here near the end of Abraham’s life?
A simple reading of the verse indicates that this is a new wife for Abraham, which is supported by commentators such as Ibn Ezra and the Rashbam. However, Rashi and other midrashic sources posit that Ketura is another name for Hagar, “whom Abraham restored to his residence to live with him at this juncture.”
Keturah, the text continues, bears Abraham several additional children whose names and descendants are listed. As Rabbi Adin Steinsaltz writes in his Torah commentary:
“Since Abraham was very old and had been infertile until the births of Ishmael and Isaac, some commentaries suggest that these were the sons of Ketura alone, and were not Abraham’s, although he raised them in his house. However, this explanation is not particularly convincing. It seems more likely that whereas Abraham considered himself elderly and advanced in age, he was still quite capable of procreation and he himself fathered a number of children from Ketura. It can also be inferred from here and from the story of the birth of Ishmael that it was Sarah who was infertile.”
I don’t want to litigate the legitimacy of that final statement here regarding Sarah, but clearly Keturah and Abraham are quite prolific. In spite of these several offspring, which is part of the fulfillment of G-d’s initial promise to Abraham, Isaac- despite he and Abraham’s troubled relationship, remains Abraham’s favored son. The Torah continues a few verses later:
וַיִּתֵּ֧ן אַבְרָהָ֛ם אֶת־כׇּל־אֲשֶׁר־ל֖וֹ לְיִצְחָֽק׃ וְלִבְנֵ֤י הַפִּֽילַגְשִׁים֙ אֲשֶׁ֣ר לְאַבְרָהָ֔ם נָתַ֥ן אַבְרָהָ֖ם מַתָּנֹ֑ת וַֽיְשַׁלְּחֵ֞ם מֵעַ֨ל יִצְחָ֤ק בְּנוֹ֙ בְּעוֹדֶ֣נּוּ חַ֔י קֵ֖דְמָה אֶל־אֶ֥רֶץ קֶֽדֶם׃
Abraham willed all that he owned to Isaac; but to Abraham’s sons by concubines Abraham gave gifts while he was still living, and he sent them away from his son Isaac eastward, to the land of the East.
Isaac is Abraham’s sole beneficiary, with his other half-siblings getting what essentially amounts to parting gifts. But this “shadow family” of Abraham’s, as I term them here, seems to play an important role: it shows the culmination of Abraham’s being the father of many nations, and a blessing to others. At age 175- “a good ripe age, old and contented” according to the Torah, he breathes his last and is gathered unto his kin.
Poetically, in this way, the parsha comes full circle along with the arc of his life: Isaac and Ishmael, his two sons from two different women, come together to bury him in the Cave of Machpelah which Abraham acquired in order to bury Sarah.
These enigmatic, faint figures in the parsha- Keturah, her and Abraham’s children, and even Isaac himself, who is so withdrawn until he is activated by meeting Rivkah- leave me with more questions. Topics such as favoritism, legacies and inheritances, and the very nature of relationships come to the fore. Which commentators are right- the ones that posit that Keturah was another name for Hagar, or was she a completely different person?
What would Isaac’s life have been like if he hadn’t been so shattered by his father’s actions? Do Abraham’s offspring from Keturah long for their own relationship with him, or do they also feel the distance that their father purposefully sets between them?
Our own close familial and personal relationships can ebb and flow. Perhaps we’ve felt at times the distance of relatives, or the sorrow when we lose someone that Abraham displays. And perhaps we’ve also felt completely awoken and finally seen for who we are, as Isaac feels when meeting Rivkah. People who bring out the best in us, and also challenge us in unexpected or unpleasant ways.
Our parsha teaches us that to emote and have feelings is what it means to be human. In moments that present a crossroads, such as the ones depicted in our parsha- the death of a spouse, a romantic encounter, or the birth of children- we show our true colors. When done with care and concern for those around us, let’s remember that that is never a bad thing. And may we be surrounded by individuals whose care and concern for us is always a given, if not always evident.
