Mort Laitner

An Existential Question

Mordechai took a seat in the Tel Avi cafe, greeted his friend with a pat on the back and ordered an espresso.

“Moshe my friend, I got a existential question for you. You got the time to schmooze?”

“Was that your existential question?”

Mordechai laughed and said, “No, but this morning, I needed that laugh. Ya see I’m a bissel worried about what I read on the internet. Ya see I didn’t sleep well last night.”

Moshe picked up his coffee cup, took a long sip and said, “Mordechai, for you boychick, I’ve always got time. So I’m all ears; I love your existential questions.”

Mordechai loved when Moshe called him, “boychick.” It reminded him of when his grandfather called him that boyish term of endearment.

“So, you’re still a big fan of Trump—aren’t ya?”

Moshe opened his shaking hands, as if he were ready to catch a basketball and simultaneously arched his shoulder blades, while exclaiming, “Yup, of course!”

And then added, “He may be the best friend Israel ever had in the White House—Jerusalem recognition as Israel’s capitol, the Golan Heights annexation and the Abraham Accords. What’s not to like?”

“Well, here’s my question, you saw that photo of that stack of top secret files, including some nation’s top secret nuclear info, lying on the floor at Mar-a-Lago?”

“Yup.”

“Well, let’s say, one of those top secret files were labeled: Israeli Atomic Weapons Program.

And let’s say, Trump took to his Mar-a-Lago Country Club home—a simplified version especially written him—of all the US intelligence on the who, what, when, where, why and how Israel protects itself with atomic weapons.

And let’s say, you know how unsecure his country club is in allowing members to join if they got the gelt or in hiring immigrants to clean, or cook, or maintain the grounds. Almost anyone can schlep around the place picking up stuff.

So, with all that background, here’s the question:

Assuming everything I said is true, is Donald Trump still Israel’s favorite President?

Moshe lifted his cup to his lips, took another long sip, looking as if he were in deep thought and replied, “Well, boychick assuming all you say is true, he ain’t no longer a friend of Israel.”

About the Author
Mort Laitner is a writer, storyteller, and lifelong observer of the wonderfully unpredictable human condition. His writing combines humor, Jewish wit, personal experience, and a healthy dose of curiosity about the rapidly changing world around us. A South Florida writer and longtime member of the writing community, Mort writes about everything from technology and artificial intelligence to Israel, Jewish life, aging, friendship, and the everyday absurdities of modern life. His stories often begin with a simple question—and then take the reader somewhere unexpected. Mort believes that good writing should make readers laugh, think, and occasionally say, “I never thought about it that way.” His work has appeared in The Times of Israel and in literary publications and anthologies. Whether writing about Moshe and Mordechai arguing over the latest news, an encounter with artificial intelligence, or the peculiarities of getting older, Mort brings his distinctive voice, humor, and humanity to every story.
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