Chanukah Light

At the top of my blessings list is my remarkable parents, who have always valued equality and faithfully practiced it. Their love for us four boys has always been equal, as has been the way they treated each of us.

This raises a difficulty in this week’s Parsha: how could Yaacov, of all people, favor one child over another by giving Yosef (Josef) the multicolored coat? What went wrong and what can we learn from it?

Rabbi Naftali Tzi Berlin, known as the Netziv, notes a change in a phrase that hints at a disastrous unintended consequence. The verse says, “Yaacov loved Yosef from all his sons.” Yaacov was aging and, as was the practice in those times, needed one of his sons to care for him in his older years. He chose the son most like him in character, the one who would understand his way of doing things best. That son was Yosef, and he gave him a coat appropriate for the role. However, the brothers perceived a different story. They saw Yaacov loving, “Yosef from all the brothers,” rather than the sons. In their eyes, it wasn’t about the son who was best suited to serve their father; it was about the brother whom the father thought was the best, and that made them very envious and angry. A subtle but tragic mistake.

Chanukah starts on Sunday night. According to Ashkenazi custom, the best way to perform the Mitzvah is for every member of the household to light their own menorah each night; however, the menorahs should not be placed too close to each other to avoid confusing the number of candles. There’s a beautiful message here: We were all made to create light, and each one of us has a unique “place” where that light needs to shine. It’s when we find that place that we can start celebrating everyone else’s light as well.

This principle, contained in the tenth of the Ten Commandments, “Do not covet,” reminds us to dig deeper and to live in an inner realm where individual opportunities, challenges, and roles are simply understood. In this realm, we can celebrate each other’s successes without feeling like a failure. It’s a realm of true happiness and joy. It is possible.