Literally, the Torah forbids Straight men situational homosexuality
For those open to rethinking interpretations since the Sixties, I combined traditional Orthodox Judaism and my own research to suggest that Leviticus 18:22 is aimed at heterosexual men choosing intercourse with a man in place of a woman, not Gay men doing what is natural to them.
On Yom Kippur afternoon, again, we will read Leviticus’s list of forbidden sexual relationships.
Ever since Pride was claimed as a motto to counter society’s shame, Jews have cringed at the verse that seemed to condemn homosexual men.
In a lengthy book, not yet published, after a lot of research, I argue that this Injunction is actually for Straight men only, to refrain from so-called replacement, transient, situational, or emergency homosexuality. Some use alcohol to lower their inhibitions; being sex-starved suffices for others.
Gay Men
Chief Rabbi Abraham Kook and Reb Moshe Feinstein (Igrot Moshe, 1981, on Even Ha’ezer, 1978, quoted in Judaism and Homosexuality, 2004, by Rabbi Chaim Rapoport), both leading rabbis of their times, abhorred the idea of homosexual sex but, later in life, admitted that for some men this seems their natural disposition and not licentiousness or debauchery. (Backers of conversion ‘therapy’ ignore or hide these partial retractions.)
The Talmud (Nedarim 51a) clarifies the qualification commonly translated as ‘abomination’ in our case specifically to mean something entirely different: going astray, abandoning one’s wife and children.
Much of what some people call offensive about homosexual men is rather their hang-up and not immoral at all, like being open about one’s sexual preference, being proud instead of ashamed, and forming sexual unions.
The situation of Lesbians is important and, in some ways, similar but also markedly different. I leave it aside here for clarity and focus.
In my understanding, Gay men are also advised (and in need) to leave their father and mother and cling to a partner and ‘become one flesh.’
The Torah that seemed reactionary, Heaven forbid, shows itself millennia ahead of its time in its advice to honor preset (inborn) gender preference.
Straight Men
No, it is not true what most modern therapists hold, that ‘You are what you do.’ Straight men’s neurobiological sexual preference stays straight. Just like homosexual men who marry women don’t turn Straight or Bi.
Our verse forbids a man from intercourse with another man ‘as with a woman’—which, in the simple reading, implies a heterosexual mindset, not a homosexual mind. The next Torah verse doesn’t ban bestiality ‘as with humans,’ so ‘as with a woman’ is meant to restrict, not to clarify.
Straight men who sometimes had intercourse with other men may have thought that, at least, they weren’t as bad as Gay men having same-sex sex all the time. In my analysis, only the former violate the Torah’s counsel.
This is far from a niche issue, with hundreds of thousands of Gay Jews and tens of millions of Gay Gentile men (conservative estimation). Still, most same-sex sexual encounters easily could involve Straight men going astray.
Considering how much other religions lean on our old interpretation, this study has much relevance for all of humanity, not just the Jews.
Besides falsely blaming Gay men, the sin of insulting, threatening, and degrading Gay men is far worse than any private, sexual (alleged) improprieties, since that offends both G^d and His children.
Men being intimate with someone outside of their sexual preference are unlikely to build a deep connection. Immediately or eventually, they’ll quit and seek someone to cleave to deeply to end their existential loneliness.
Gay sex for Straight men will lack depth. Therapy shows that superficial sex may lead to a sex addiction and not to mutual closeness, intimacy, and bonding that sex seems fit for, just as the above Talmud quote suggests.
Orthodox Rabbis must start to speak out against same-sex intercourse by heterosexual men! This is one of the only three cardinal sins. And they should advocate for always speaking highly of Gays to lower the suicide numbers. It could be a close one of yours. Don’t stand idly by their blood!
It’s high time the uncomfortable shoe was on the other foot for a change.
If you find it hard to stand with homosexual men and be a vocal ally, I will let you quote from this post without crediting me. I show it can be done!
I also want to clarify that G^d is not ‘hurt,’ Heaven forbid, when a sexual sin is committed. These Laws are only for our well-being. So, we should strive to use these Guidelines to further our mental health, not distress.
Happy Yom Kippur!
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MM is a prolific and creative writer and thinker, previously a daily blog contributor to the TOI. He often makes his readers laugh, mad, or assume he's nuts—close to perfect blogging. He's proud that his analytical short comments are removed both from left-wing and right-wing news sites. None of his content is generated by the new bore on the block, AI. *
As a frontier thinker, he sees things many don't yet. He's half a prophet. Half. Let's not exaggerate. Or not at all because he doesn't claim G^d talks to him. He gives him good ideas—that's all. MM doesn't believe that people observe and think in a vacuum. He, therefore, wanted a broad bio that readers interested can track a bit what (lack of) backgrounds, experiences, and educations contribute to his visions. *
This year, he will prioritize getting his unpublished books published rather than just blog posts. Of the 15 (!) books he has in mind, the next two are about homosexuality in Judaism and new rabbinics. Next year, he hopes to focus on activism against human extinction. To find less-recent posts on a subject XXX among his over 2600 archived ones, go to the right-top corner of a Times of Israel page, click on the search icon and search "zuiden, XXX". One can find a second, wilder blog that also may contain updates to Times of Israel posts, to which one may subscribe, here: https://mmvanzuiden.wordpress.com/ or by clicking on the globe icon next to his picture on top. *
He's getting ready to publicize books on: "Free Will, "Judaism and Homosexuality, "His parents in the Holocaust, "Judaism, "A New Torah Translation and "A New Hebrew Grammar, "Co-Counseling, "Vegan Facts, "Immortality, and more. *
Like most of his readers, he believes in being friendly, respectful, and loyal. However, if you think those are his absolute top priorities, you might end up disappointed. His first loyalty is to the truth. He agrees that in a post-truth world, that's irrelevant, but then this is for the record. He will try to stay within the limits of democratic and Jewish law, but he won't lie to support opinions or people when don't deserve that. (Yet, we all make honest mistakes, which is just fine and does not justify losing support.) He admits that he sometimes exaggerates to make a point, which could have him come across as nasty, while in actuality, he's quite a lovely person to interact with. He holds - how Dutch - that a strong opinion doesn't imply intolerance of other views. *
Sometimes he's misunderstood because his wide and diverse field of vision seldomly fits any specialist's box. But that's exactly what some love about him. He has written a lot about Psychology (including Sexuality and Abuse), Medicine (including physical immortality), Science (including basic statistics), Politics (Israel, the US, and the Netherlands, Activism - more than leftwing or rightwing, he hopes to highlight reality), Oppression and Liberation (intersectionally, for young people, the elderly, non-Whites, women, workers, Jews, LGBTQIA+, foreigners and anyone else who's dehumanized or exploited), Integrity, Philosophy, Jews (Judaism, Zionism, Holocaust and Jewish Liberation), the Climate Crisis, Ecology and Veganism, Affairs from the news, or the Torah Portion of the Week, or new insights that suddenly befell him. *
Chronologically, his most influential teachers are his parents, Nico (natan) van Zuiden and Betty (beisye) Nieweg, Wim Kan, Mozart, Harvey Jackins, Marshal Rosenberg, Reb Shlomo Carlebach, and, lehavdil bein chayim lechayim, Rabbi Dr. Natan Lopes Cardozo, Rav Zev Leff, and Rav Meir Lubin. This short list doesn't mean to disrespect others who taught him a lot or a little. One of his rabbis calls him Mr. Innovation [Ish haChidushim]. Yet, his originalities seem to root deeply in traditional Judaism, though they may grow in unexpected directions. In fact, he claims he's modernizing nothing. Rather, mainly basing himself on the basic Hebrew Torah text, he tries to rediscover classical Jewish thought almost lost in thousands of years of stifling Gentile domination and Jewish assimilation. (He pleads for a close reading of the Torah instead of going by rough assumptions of what it would probably mean and before fleeing to Commentaries.) This, in all aspects of life, but prominently in the areas of Free Will, Activism, Homosexuality for men, and Redemption. *
He hopes that his words will inspire and inform, and disturb the comfortable and comfort the disturbed. He aims to bring a fresh perspective rather than harp on the obvious and familiar. When he can, he loves to write encyclopedic overviews. He doesn't expect his readers to agree. Rather, original minds should be disputed. In short, his main political positions are among others: anti-Trumpism, for Zionism, Intersectionality, non-violence, anti those who abuse democratic liberties, anti the fake ME peace process, for original-Orthodoxy, pro-Science, pro-Free Will, anti-blaming-the-victim, and for down-to-earth, classical optimism, and happiness. Read his blog on how he attempts to bridge any tensions between those ideas or fields. *
He is a fetal survivor of the pharmaceutical industry (https://diethylstilbestrol.co.uk/studies/des-and-psychological-health/), born in 1953 to his parents who were Dutch-Jewish Holocaust survivors who met in the largest concentration camp in the Netherlands, Westerbork. He grew up a humble listener. It took him decades to become a speaker too, and decades more to admit to being a genius. But his humility was his to keep. And so was his honesty. Bullies and con artists almost instantaneously envy and hate him. He hopes to bring new things and not just preach to the choir. *
He holds a BA in medicine (University of Amsterdam) – is half a doctor. He practices Re-evaluation Co-counseling since 1977, is not an official teacher anymore, and became a friendly, powerful therapist. He became a social activist, became religious, made Aliyah, and raised three wonderful kids. Previously, for decades, he was known to the Jerusalem Post readers as a frequent letter writer. For a couple of years, he was active in hasbara to the Dutch-speaking public. He wrote an unpublished tome about Jewish Free Will. He's a strict vegan since 2008. He's an Orthodox Jew but not a rabbi. *
His writing has been made possible by an allowance for second-generation Holocaust survivors from the Netherlands. It has been his dream since he was 38 to try to make a difference by teaching through writing. He had three times 9-out-of-10 for Dutch at his high school finals but is spending his days communicating in English and Hebrew - how ironic. G-d must have a fine sense of humor. In case you wonder - yes, he is a bit dyslectic. If you're a native English speaker and wonder why you should read from people whose English is only their second language, consider the advantage of having an original peek outside of your cultural bubble. His posts are spell, grammar, and style polished by AI, but all written by himself. *
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His newest books you may find here: https://www.amazon.com/s?i=stripbooks&rh=p_27%3AMoshe-Mordechai%2FMaurits+van+Zuiden&s=relevancerank&text=Moshe-Mordechai%2FMaurits+van+Zuiden&ref=dp_byline_sr_book_1
