How far is a marathon?

My preoccupation with the Bibas family inevitably leads me to obsess about a marathon distance run. A marathon is not really that far. A car can easily (and legally) cover the distance in under 40 minutes, assuming traffic doesn’t slow you down. World-class marathon runners can finish the distance with times close to two hours.  An average marathon runner generally finishes the distance in about four and a half hours. According to Google Maps, a regular person can walk the exact marathon route I am obsessing over in 9 hours and 37 minutes.

The route I am thinking of is the distance from my family’s home in Be’er Sheva to Nir Oz. Nir Oz was the place where the Bibas family was building their home  — until Hamas violently invaded our country on October 7th.

Yarden Bibas has lost everything. His home was destroyed. He was kidnapped by armed terrorists, separated from his wife and children, and starved in a cage underground for 484 days. Upon his release he discovered that our government didn’t have definitive answers regarding the fate of his wife and children. The only ones who knew the definitive status of his wife and children were their vicious captors.

Until his 4-year-old son, and baby boy returned home in coffins. A coffin with a picture of his wife on it was returned as well, but it’s not her body and her fate is still unknown. 

I cannot imagine what that is like. But I have to imagine that it could happen to me, and others in my community because it happened to Yarden. On October 7th, the terrorists, human beings from a different world imbued with values incompatible with my life, liberty and pursuit of happiness, were moving in my direction — until they were stopped in Ofakim after murdering 27 residents and six policemen in that city.

Ofakim is a half-marathon distance away from our home, only 20 minutes by car. Elite human beings can run this distance in under an hour. I once ran this distance at the Jerusalem Marathon in 2 hours and 17 minutes.  According to Google Maps, a person can walk this exact route in 4 hours and 26 minutes.

Our children are the bright, shining light of our home. Yarden’s children were so beautiful. Today, the world is dimmer as we finally acknowledge that they are gone. Not just them but also Oded Lifshitz. So much light has been lost since that fateful day, a day of celebration which was transformed into unimaginable horror. In any event we cannot stop fighting for the remaining hostages, whom we desperately want back. And we cannot stop praying they will live to shine in the daylight of a brighter future.  

I have been distracted the last few days, trying to keep the hope alive in opposition to the facts I read in the newspaper and hear on the radio. But I decided to try because that’s what their family requested. As a Jew, they are part of my family, and as an Israeli, they are part of my family. It has been draining, but I remember Yarden and what he has just been through, and I have been trying with all my heart, with all my soul, and with all my might.

It has been hard, but when I reflect I am forced to admit that they have the right attitude. We should keep hope alive, especially when it is just a glimmer. Hope (Hatikva) is literally the national anthem. There is something very Jewish about keeping hope alive in unimaginably challenging circumstances, and there is something very Israeli about hoping that your impossible dreams can become reality.

Ariel, may your memory be a blessing.

Kfir, may your memory be a blessing.

Yarden may Hashem comfort you among the mourners of Zion and Jerusalem. And I will keep hoping and praying for the Shiri’s safety and the return of all our beloved hostages.