If At First
Our calendar of Torah readings is arranged so that certain readings precede specific annual events, and one of the most famous of these scheduling priorities is that Parshat Nitzavim always is read right before Rosh Hashanah. This should come as no surprise because Chapter 30 of Devarim in this reading is called Parshat Teshuva, the section about the repentance process. It definitely is meant to get us ready for the Teshuva season.
When we look at the ten verses of this section, we immediately notice that the big reveal is that all of the warnings from last week’s Torah reading will actually transpire, eventually. As this opening verse informs us: And it will be when all of these things will have transpired, both the blessing and the curse…(Devarim 30:1).
Only after all these historical developments have transpired will you ‘return’ to God. What exactly does this ‘return’ include? Well, that seems to be complicated. The root SHUV appears in various forms seven times in these 10 verses.
One could make a case (and numerous commentaries do) that each appearance represents another aspect of ‘return’. The physical return to Eretz Yisrael; the spiritual return to Torah values and performance, a return to connection with God, and (according to Rav Hirsch) God will return to you.
Cool! But why did ‘everything’ have to transpire before the return? Couldn’t we just have the blessings and the good times. Why does there seem to be an assurance of the curses and the truly terrible experiences (a complete list of the ‘bad times’ would fill volumes)?
Mei Shiloach explains: Within the curse, the blessing also exists in secret. ‘You shall take them to your heart’, means that you shall take to your heart that the blessing also exists within the curse.
What does that mean? Because God’s hidden voice exists within everything and everywhere, when you are at the ends of the earth, far from Eretz Yisrael and Torah, God’s voice will eventually reach you. This voice comes when you’ve despaired of finding it, but because God is truly everywhere it will find you. In the ‘curse’ is the ‘blessing’ of understanding the true ubiquitous nature of God.
The Kli Yakar explains that the true meaning of this portion is to teach that it is only at the extremities, in the most dire straits (MIN HAMEITZAR) that finally the Jew asks: Why has God driven me here? That’s the beginning of the way back, the TESHUVA process.
All of these speculations are terrific and there are more. But simple, old me thinks there’s another approach, uncomplicated and straightforward: We have the multiple repetition of the concept of TESHUVA, because we have to do it over and over again.
As hinted in my title: If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again! If your initial attempts at Teshuva fail, do it again.
When I was working in a shul as educational director, probably the most common question I was asked was: Why must I repeat the exact same formula for TESHUVA every year? Well, because we tend to repeat the same sins over and over again.
Most attempts at personal reform fail. According to Open AI, over 70% of those with alcohol disorder relapse; 85 to 90% of overweight people relapse; 78 to 85% of heroin addicts relapse. I bet the stats are similar for LASHON HARA or embarrassing others.
In other words, we repeat our errors. So, that’s the amazing educational lesson. It’s like the great college basketball coach John Wooden used to say: The eight laws of learning are explanation, demonstration, imitation, repetition, repetition, repetition, repetition, repetition.
We need a system to help us maintain the repetition. And BARUCH HASHEM, that great Jewish ethicist Reb Yisrael Salanter discussed this very issue.
He suggested that there are 13 areas of personal traits which we must monitor constantly (or at least daily), and they are: Diligence: Continuous effort on any planned project until it is fully finished. Respect: Honoring the inherent dignity and rights of every person. Tranquility: Acting with calm composure rather than turbulent emotions. Pleasantness: Using gentle, soft speech and avoiding yelling. Cleanliness: Maintaining pure bodies and clothing as vessels for holiness. Forbearance: Accepting difficult trials and hardships with grace. Order: Organizing actions and speech logically (“first things first”). Humility: Being deeply aware of one’s own faults while ignoring the faults of others. Justice: Conducting all personal and business dealings fairly without wronging anyone. Thrift: Managing and using financial resources wisely. Silence: Thinking carefully before speaking and avoiding idle chatter. Truth: Speaking with absolute integrity and living genuinely. Use of Time: Treating time as a precious, non-renewable resource to prioritize meaningful actions.
Making a chart and monitoring your adherence to these traits is a wonderful Rosh Hashanah commitment to make.
One of the fascinating side stories about this program of Rav Salanter’s is that he based it on an essay written by a Jewish writer named Menachem Mendel Lefin, who credited the idea to Benjamin Franklin. Happy 250th B’day, America!
Curiously, Ol’ Ben Franklin also had 13 traits. Why? I don’t know. But we love the number 13! It’s the number of TIKUN (fixing that which is broken). That’s the 13 MIDOT of God to repair our sins; that’s adding a 13th blessing in Shmone Esre; that’s adding a 13th month to square the lunar year with the solar year; that’s counting the 12 Tribes as 13 so Yosef could get his double blessing.
So, let’s think about this as we begin chanting the 13 Midot of God during the Selichot which we Ashkenazim begin this Motzei Shabbat. Pray that the TIKUN of 13 can help us be the best we can possibly be this coming year. It’s worth the effort!!
