In the Holiday Dispirit
Checking my news feed: morning rumors silenced. Social media should not proclaim deaths before official notices are delivered, and maybe it’s fake news. Last night’s news about Hamas information uncovered by the IDF in the vicinity of Sinwar’s body. Morning news about a UAV aimed at the Netanyahu residence hit in Caesarea. That elicited similar cynicism in later discussions with two different people: Some Israelis will claim it was part of a leftist conspiracy. Suicide-terrorist killed in car accident upon crashing into Israeli police car. Civilian killed near Akko by shrapnel from intercepted UAV. Sirens in the north.
Going through some motions of Sukkot. Yom Kippur, a long week ago. We didn’t hear booms Erev Yom Kippur when an independent living facility was struck in Herzliya. Our 5th grade granddaughter was bicycling that evening with classmates, in nearby Raanana. She heard booms. She said she wasn’t frightened, only worried about her mother worrying about her.
Yom Kippur bicycling is a thing for kids, with no cars on the roads for over 24 hours. Bicycle sales rise before the holiday. Our local bike store bustles with outdoor displays and lighting between Rosh Hashana and Yom Kippur. I barely noticed it this year. Then one morning, a radio broadcaster commented, that contrary to other years, there are no reports comparing current bicycle prices to last year.
I noticed I barely saw packaged sukkot (2by4s and canvas sheets for the temporary outdoor structure, the sukkah) for sale outside of supermarkets and other stores. When I finally saw sukkah decorations (many like Christmas tinsel decorations) for sale, I realized I hadn’t seen them everywhere. It’s a different year. Flash: Father on television, waiting for his son’s return from the fatal Nova party to help take down the sukkah – 2023.
Prior to Yom Kippur, it’s customary to ask forgiveness of people you may have hurt in the last year, wish them an easy fast and “Gmar Hatimah Tova” (to be inscribed in the Book of Life). True to the season dispirit, I only managed some such efforts after Yom Kippur, adding regrets for not wishing happy new year before Rosh Hashana.
The evening after Yom Kippur a UAV hit near Binyamina. Casualties, injuries. A dining room. Where is the communal dining room and why is the location withheld? Israelis understand – a military base.
The expanding range of Hezbollah targets was decisive: Dinner at home with the kids Erev Sukkot. Not going northward to relatives who invited us.
Next afternoon, another siren in our area. Anticipating another at night, it’s hard to sleep. The next night I sleep well, tired from the sleepless night before. Quiet where we live. Not so in northern Israel.
Alarms ring in my ears. Thursday, first day of Sukkot, news spreads: high probability Sinwar killed. Photos. Temptation to peek. Determination not to look. Ultimately, seen multiple times.
Today, television reporting Israeli attack in Beirut. Roaming thoughts: residents are told to leave within 36 hours– what do they take? Is there a where-to-go plan? Or are they human shields? Hezbollah collaborators? Will we find entrances to tunnels in their children’s bedrooms? Tunnels into Israel. Distractions.
Back to Sinwar. Celebrations? Certainly, no mourning. But reminders that only the release of the remaining 101 hostages in Gaza is reason to celebrate.
Israeli media acknowledges Gazans relieved to be rid of Sinwar. Yet, applauded Hamas parading Israeli hostages into Gaza on October 7. Israel needs Gaza in hands which will guarantee its security. Israelis planning new settlements in Gaza during the week of Sukkot must be stopped. I wouldn’t place bets on Netanyahu for this. I hope Intelligence authorities convince him, and it’s prevented.
A week of television broadcasting a documentary project with an emerging message: fighting in Gaza and rescuing hostages are mutually exclusive strategies.
Video clips, New York Times reports, Al Jazeera, activating scales in your mind, recognizing biases and truths. Evidence of some IDF soldiers, provided by IDF soldiers, shooting children, not because it’s warranted. Just evil, or traumatized, or convinced they are doing justice? I’m convinced, it’s horrific.
Reminded of Michael Walzer’s New York Times op-ed, Israel’s Pager Bombs Have No Place in a Just War, agreeing with his arguments, because you can’t have it both ways. Crossing the street on a redlight because there’s no traffic – a dilemma? And when you’re with a child? I agree with Walzer because we need law and order as our measure.
Increasing voices of Jewish Israeli supremacy in expanding circles of society abandon values and norms I thought inseparable from Jewish ethics. I was wrong.
There will be indelible stains, and a way to transcend this – someday. Sinking into disillusionment, envisioning intricately rationalized narratives, then, reckoning with narratives of truth – enabling a new generation to create a different future.
Harriet Gimpel, October 19, 2024
