Moshe-Mordechai van Zuiden
Psychology, Medicine, Science, Politics, Oppression, Integrity, Philosophy, Jews

Jewish musician advocates Muslims to go date a Jew

Who needs enemies with lovers like that?

Isn’t it great, any love story? It’s swimming against the tide to say: “Not always.” But exactly that, I will do, while trying to sound reasonable.

Mind you: he’s Jewish, she’s Muslim.

That means that for traditional Muslims, their kids will be Jewish.
And for traditional Jews, their children will be Muslim.

With a variation to National Brotherhood Week by Tom Lehrer:
All the Muslims hate the pap
And all the Jews hate the mum
All the Christians hate the both
And everybody hates the kids.

I really don’t think it’s bad when one Muslim family line becomes non-Muslim, starts adhering to another idealism (Socialism, Veganism, Christianity, whatever). But when one Jewish family member opts out and goes Gentile, it’s a disaster. In every single case. Because Jews have a commitment to G^d and Humanity to lead setting the world right. If your mate is not into that, nothing will be left of that commitment.

(Also the consequences seem different in the two communities. For Jewish Law, such a man cannot be counted in a minyan or called up to the Torah; something violating Shabbat or kashrut laws cannot do. I’m no expert on Islam but I heard often that leaving Islam warrants the death penalty.)

S/he could join you? S/he supports the Jew in you? Then s/he must convert to Judaism first. If s/he is unwilling or unfit, s/he’s not for you.

Maybe you can’t force love but you must be able to say no in life.

BTW, Jewish parents, don’t tell your kids that Gentiles are anything less than us. It’s bad advertising and it’s not true. And when your child then finally meets this lovely, amazing, relaxed Gentile, don’t blame them for falling in love. Rather, say: “Gentiles can be wonderful people but what can we do? Our Father in Heaven has forbidden us to marry them.”

Our portion of the week contains the Ten Commandments, for us to spread throughout the world. That’s why they were given in no man’s land. They’re not ours to keep to ourselves. It starts with abundantly honoring a righteous Gentile who wants to help us. And his daughter who converted.

A Jew marrying out is also an unbelievable affront to and refutation of all the sacrifices hundreds of their ancestors made to stay Jewish.

He says he wanted to bring humor into Jazz and his situation. I understand that he feels like he needs to defend himself but I don’t find it funny. I call it making light of what isn’t. He should be democratically free to marry anyone he wants and face no social restrictions of personal scorn. But it’s not funny.

It’s different for a Jewish woman marrying out. At least her kids are Jewish (prenatal time counts!) and she has no obligation to marry. (But if she does, she should marry a Jew too.)

But he’s not so religious — how much damage did he do? Well, if he’d learn more Judaism, he’d know. I’m sure he meant no harm. And she loves a Jews. That can’t be wrong.

Yes, it’s very brave of them. But things done boldly can still be wrong.

One could object: But if he found love, what’s bad about that? It’s not the love that is bad. And I’m happy for his good fortune. But for me it means the same as a Jew converting, a disaster. And like every Jewish marriage and baby is happiness for all Jews, the opposite is sadness for all of us.

And if they’ll have kids, I’m sure they’ll be wonderful. But I hope they’ll convert to Judaism and become (married to) leading rabbis of their generation. And forgive their father for the trouble he gave them.

All people should intermarry. Anything else is nationalism, racism, cultural elitism and supremacy. One is German and one is Italian — adding up their cultures is enrichment. And kids being bilingual from the cradle. Great!

But this song doesn’t advocate that. He needs to give up being Jewish (having Jewish kids) and she should give up being a Muslim (drink beer and wine). The worst of both worlds. People who intermarry should appreciate cultural enrichment, not erase the ethical roots of each other’s heritage. (Yet, in a later explanation, they seem to try take the best of both worlds.)

One exception: the Jews.

We’re of all races. We’re of all cultures. We’re of all times. We’re the only People founded on a holy timeless Calling you’re not allowed to undo. Intermarriage with a Jew is not mutual enrichment but watering down the Jewish Mission. It’s not just your life to squander. Put it to music or not.

About the Author
MM is a prolific and creative writer and thinker, a daily blog contributor to the TOI. He is a fetal survivor of the pharmaceutical industry (, born in 1953 to two Dutch survivors who met in the largest concentration camp in the Netherlands, Westerbork, and holds a BA in medicine (University of Amsterdam). He taught Re-evaluation Co-counseling, became a social activist, became religious, made Aliyah, and raised three wonderful kids. He wrote an unpublished tome about Jewish Free Will. He's a strict vegan since 2008. He's an Orthodox Jew but not a rabbi. * His most influential teachers (chronologically) are: his parents, Nico (natan) van Zuiden and Betty (beisye) Nieweg, Wim Kan, Mozart, Harvey Jackins, Marshal Rosenberg, Reb Shlomo Carlebach and lehavdiel bein chayim lechayim: Rabbi Dr. Natan Lopes Cardozo, Rav Zev Leff and Rav Meir Lubin. * Previously, for decades, he was known to the Jerusalem Post readers as a frequent letter writer. For a couple of years he wrote hasbara for the Dutch public. His fields of attention now are varied: Psychology (including Sexuality and Abuse), Medicine (including physical immortality), Science (statistics), Politics (Israel, the US and the Netherlands, Activism - more than leftwing or rightwing, he hopes to highlight Truth), Oppression and Liberation (intersectionally, for young people, the elderly, non-Whites, women, workers, Jews, GLBTQAI, foreigners and anyone else who's dehumanized or exploited), Integrity, Philosophy, Jews (Judaism, Zionism, Holocaust and Jewish Liberation), Ecology and Veganism. Sometimes he's misunderstood because he has such a wide vision that never fits any specialist's box. But that's exactly what many love about him. Many of his posts relate to affairs from the news or the Torah Portion of the Week or are new insights that suddenly befell him. * He hopes that his words will inspire and inform, reassure the doubters but make the self-assured doubt more. He strives to bring a fresh perspective rather than bore you with the obvious. He doesn't expect his readers to agree. Rather, original minds must be disputed. In short, his main political positions are: anti-Trumpism, for Zionism, Intersectionality, non-violence, democracy, anti the fake peace process, for original-Orthodoxy, Science, Free Will, anti blaming-the-victim and for down-to-earth optimism. Read his blog how he attempts to bridge any discrepancies. He admits sometimes exaggerating to make a point, which could have him come across as nasty, while in actuality, he's quit a lovely person to interact with. He holds - how Dutch - that a strong opinion doesn't imply intolerance of other views. * His writing has been made possible by an allowance for second generation Holocaust survivors from the Netherlands. It has been his dream since he was 38 to try to make a difference by teaching through writing. He had three times 9-out-of-10 for Dutch at his high school finals but is spending his days communicating in English and Hebrew - how ironic. G-d must have a fine sense of humor. In case you wonder - yes, he is a bit dyslectic. November 13, 2018, he published his 500st blog post with the ToI. If you're a native English speaker and wonder why you should read from people whose English is only their second language, consider the advantage of having a peek outside of your cultural bubble. * NEW: To see other blog posts by him, his overspill blog you can reach by clicking on the Website icon next to his picture at the head of every post. There you may find precursors to later TOI blog posts, addition or corrections of published TOI blog posts, blog posts the TOI will not carry and some thoughts that are too short to be a TOI blog post. Also, the TOI only allows for one blog post per blogger per 24 hours. Sometimes, he has more to say than that. * To send any personal reaction to him, scroll to the top of the blog post and click Contact Me.
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