New bogus studies confirm: Coffee consumption prolongs life

After reading that meat, fish, milk, eggs, sex and wine are “healthy,” now it was coffee’s turn to have two new pieces of propaganda, which is really nothing new. These charades are hard to unravel for the lay person, but with my shallow medical training even, I find it no problem.

People who drank two to four cups a day had an 18% lower risk of death compared with people who did not drink coffee

The time has gone that the doctor was seen as G-d’s right hand – no, G-d Himself. As if it were the doctors of medicine who decided about Life and Death. Nowadays, modern people dare to ask their GPs questions, and many physicians themselves try not to decide for their patients, but rather inform them to help them and let them makes their own choices about their own lives.

However, the power of the medical word (or better: the pseudo-medical word) is still great. The powerful pharmaceutical industry still tries to sell their potions (or: poisons) to the public with wild claims (and lengthy disclaimers) as if they could hand out health itself.

Other profiteers are paramedical and medical academics. They need money (and esteem) for their laboratories and research. This is best acquired by publishing questionable but hopeful “results” that should justify a further influx into their profitable (to themselves) work. Medical journalists, who don’t know the first thing (especially not the first thing) about medical science, healthcare or health, faithfully and excitedly report the propaganda, making the public fooled on a regular basis.

If one would want to investigate the effect of drinking and not drinking coffee on life expectancy, it should be done by having two comparable groups of people drink something that looks, tastes, smells and feels like coffee, but one group gets the real stuff and the other a placebo. Anything less rigorous is doomed to give ridiculous results worth nothing.

These new studies are cases in point. They investigated really large groups of people. But if the setup is biased, one can make the two groups each one billion people and the results are still worthless. Further, the two groups from these reports are not similar at all. Why did one group decide to drink coffee and the other not? Last but not least, many doctors drink coffee themselves, so they just are inclined to prove that its harmless – no, better: beneficial.

In the kind of semi-statistical surveys as this new one, the following is one mechanism that could explain a positive health effect of something like coffee (speculation just to show a major sticking point!). Say: Many people eat junk food (white bread included). This clogs their arteries. Coffee could stops some of that deterioration. Then, in a large sample coffee comes out “healthy.” (There is nothing healthy about Aspirin, just because it could be of benefit to some sick people.) However, the real solution in this hypothetical health problem is to help people eat well (fibers). To them coffee will show its true face: destructive to health and lifespan.

And now the simple truth. Some reality doesn’t need large statistical examinations to uncover.

Most people find coffee disgusting. It’s water that streamed over completely charred beans that contain caffeine. The taste is so revolting that most can only drink it with lots of sugar and milk added. To get used to the smell, taste and energy boost from a young age may help conquer the revulsion. Also addiction to the drug may help. And long-term associating it with taking a break and having a chat may also endear it to drinkers.
Just like many alcoholics cannot get out of bed without alcohol (that doesn’t make it healthy!), many coffee drinkers are dysfunctional in the morning until at least one cup of joe. Withdrawal symptom number one: difficulty to wake up, followed by: moodiness – to put it mildly. The reason is known. Coffee disturbs our deepest sleep. Even one cup in the morning will the next night rob one of the total profit of a good night of sleep. Remedy (but not really): yet another cup. This is the ideal business concept, if you ask me: to sell something that has a negative health effect that needs it to be taken again to overcome it.
Stopping with coffee altogether gives as withdrawal effect also splitting headaches. However, after a few weeks, this all disappears. Then again, it’s great to wake up refreshed. It’s not so good for capitalism, that needs workers to not stop when tired. But no one can fool me to believe that it would be beneficial to drink drugs that make us deny our physical needs for rest and sleep, and on top of that rob us of part of our natural rest. One systematic mistake made by many medical scientists is that if something doesn’t kill you it’s good. Common sense is enough to say: I want to live well without drugs and listen to my emotional and physical needs. Doctors who then come tell us that if you do that you’ll die earlier will need to come up with pretty good proofs. We’re not going to join the drugged majority on basis of shoddy “research.”

Coffee is great when you are addicted. I saw a heroin addict claim the same about heroin. And it’s almost a must after a bad night of shallow sleep – caused by coffee. Yet, throw out the rubbish and you will feel better and fitter in a few weeks. And more real. What’s wrong with a good yawn and going to bed in time?

About the Author

MM is a prolific and creative writer and thinker, previously a daily blog contributor to the TOI. He often makes his readers laugh, mad, or assume he's nuts—close to perfect blogging. He's proud that his analytical short comments are removed both from left-wing and right-wing news sites. None of his content is generated by the new bore on the block, AI. * As a frontier thinker, he sees things many don't yet. He's half a prophet. Half. Let's not exaggerate. Or not at all because he doesn't claim G^d talks to him. He gives him good ideas—that's all. MM doesn't believe that people observe and think in a vacuum. He, therefore, wanted a broad bio that readers interested can track a bit what (lack of) backgrounds, experiences, and educations contribute to his visions. * This year, he will prioritize getting his unpublished books published rather than just blog posts. Next year, he hopes to focus on activism against human extinction. To find less-recent posts on a subject XXX among his over 2000 archived ones, go to the right-top corner of a Times of Israel page, click on the search icon and search "zuiden, XXX". One can find a second, wilder blog, to which one may subscribe too, here: https://mmvanzuiden.wordpress.com/ or by clicking on the globe icon next to his picture on top. * Like most of his readers, he believes in being friendly, respectful, and loyal. However, if you think those are his absolute top priorities, you might end up disappointed. His first loyalty is to the truth. He will try to stay within the limits of democratic and Jewish law, but he won't lie to support opinions or people when don't deserve that. (Yet, we all make honest mistakes, which is just fine and does not justify losing support.) He admits that he sometimes exaggerates to make a point, which could have him come across as nasty, while in actuality, he's quite a lovely person to interact with. He holds - how Dutch - that a strong opinion doesn't imply intolerance of other views. * Sometimes he's misunderstood because his wide and diverse field of vision seldomly fits any specialist's box. But that's exactly what some love about him. He has written a lot about Psychology (including Sexuality and Abuse), Medicine (including physical immortality), Science (including basic statistics), Politics (Israel, the US, and the Netherlands, Activism - more than leftwing or rightwing, he hopes to highlight reality), Oppression and Liberation (intersectionally, for young people, the elderly, non-Whites, women, workers, Jews, LGBTQIA+, foreigners and anyone else who's dehumanized or exploited), Integrity, Philosophy, Jews (Judaism, Zionism, Holocaust and Jewish Liberation), the Climate Crisis, Ecology and Veganism, Affairs from the news, or the Torah Portion of the Week, or new insights that suddenly befell him. * Chronologically, his most influential teachers are his parents, Nico (natan) van Zuiden and Betty (beisye) Nieweg, Wim Kan, Mozart, Harvey Jackins, Marshal Rosenberg, Reb Shlomo Carlebach, and, lehavdil bein chayim lechayim, Rabbi Dr. Natan Lopes Cardozo, Rav Zev Leff, and Rav Meir Lubin. This short list doesn't mean to disrespect others who taught him a lot or a little. One of his rabbis calls him Mr. Innovation [Ish haChidushim]. Yet, his originalities seem to root deeply in traditional Judaism, though they may grow in unexpected directions. In fact, he claims he's modernizing nothing. Rather, mainly basing himself on the basic Hebrew Torah text, he tries to rediscover classical Jewish thought almost lost in thousands of years of stifling Gentile domination and Jewish assimilation. (He pleads for a close reading of the Torah instead of going by rough assumptions of what it would probably mean and before fleeing to Commentaries.) This, in all aspects of life, but prominently in the areas of Free Will, Activism, Homosexuality for men, and Redemption. * He hopes that his words will inspire and inform, and disturb the comfortable and comfort the disturbed. He aims to bring a fresh perspective rather than harp on the obvious and familiar. When he can, he loves to write encyclopedic overviews. He doesn't expect his readers to agree. Rather, original minds should be disputed. In short, his main political positions are among others: anti-Trumpism, for Zionism, Intersectionality, non-violence, anti those who abuse democratic liberties, anti the fake ME peace process, for original-Orthodoxy, pro-Science, pro-Free Will, anti-blaming-the-victim, and for down-to-earth, classical optimism, and happiness. Read his blog on how he attempts to bridge any tensions between those ideas or fields. * He is a fetal survivor of the pharmaceutical industry (https://diethylstilbestrol.co.uk/studies/des-and-psychological-health/), born in 1953 to his parents who were Dutch-Jewish Holocaust survivors who met in the largest concentration camp in the Netherlands, Westerbork. He grew up a humble listener. It took him decades to become a speaker too, and decades more to admit to being a genius. But his humility was his to keep. And so was his honesty. Bullies and con artists almost instantaneously envy and hate him. He hopes to bring new things and not just preach to the choir. * He holds a BA in medicine (University of Amsterdam) – is half a doctor. He practices Re-evaluation Co-counseling since 1977, is not an official teacher anymore, and became a friendly, powerful therapist. He became a social activist, became religious, made Aliyah, and raised three wonderful kids. Previously, for decades, he was known to the Jerusalem Post readers as a frequent letter writer. For a couple of years, he was active in hasbara to the Dutch-speaking public. He wrote an unpublished tome about Jewish Free Will. He's a strict vegan since 2008. He's an Orthodox Jew but not a rabbi. * His writing has been made possible by an allowance for second-generation Holocaust survivors from the Netherlands. It has been his dream since he was 38 to try to make a difference by teaching through writing. He had three times 9-out-of-10 for Dutch at his high school finals but is spending his days communicating in English and Hebrew - how ironic. G-d must have a fine sense of humor. In case you wonder - yes, he is a bit dyslectic. If you're a native English speaker and wonder why you should read from people whose English is only their second language, consider the advantage of having an original peek outside of your cultural bubble. * To send any personal reaction to him, scroll to the top of the blog post and click Contact Me. * His newest books you may find here: https://www.amazon.com/s?i=stripbooks&rh=p_27%3AMoshe-Mordechai%2FMaurits+van+Zuiden&s=relevancerank&text=Moshe-Mordechai%2FMaurits+van+Zuiden&ref=dp_byline_sr_book_1