Revelations in Elul

We are in the glorious month of Elul, an entire month devoted to careful introspection and uncovering the potential that lies deep within us for change. This month of preparation allows us to ease into Rosh Hashanah with some grace. But it wasn’t always this way for me. I only learned about the significance of this month in my adult years, and its beauty was a total revelation.

Growing up as a Conservative (Masorti) Jew in America, it was the “High Holidays” (Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur) that called us into synagogue. I had little preparation for the solemn and serious tone that filled the room. Not attending services on a regular basis, I was unprepared for the change. Back then, I was unaware of the power of the Jewish calendar’s rhythm, gently guiding me through the ups and downs of a Jewish way of life. The holidays, speckled and splattered through the year, seemed to be just that, bits of paint randomly appearing on a canvas, without any relation to the whole.

When I learned more about the brilliance of the Jewish calendar—its pace, intention, and purpose—I grew to value the ebbs and flows of the yearly cycle. I began to appreciate the spiritual grounding offered by this incredible system of support which I didn’t have before.

While most Israelis living in Israel experience this rhythm in everyday life, for those who choose to live elsewhere, what they’ve told me they miss the most is that—the palpable energy infusing the markets and the feverish bustling on the streets. There isn’t much effort required in order to feel the pulsing heartbeat of the chaggim [holidays].

Living in America, I can’t even imagine being immersed in that way. Perhaps if I lived in a densely Jewish area, I might feel a sliver. Otherwise, it’s me, shopping at my local supermarket and browsing the insignificant shelf all the way at the end of the “International Aisle”. This section displays a comical mash-up of Jewish holiday foods: Matzo, cans of tahini, potato pancake and matzo ball mixes, sardines, chocolate coins, honey, and bars of Parve chocolate. Yum. So I travel far, really far, to shop at a kosher supermarket so I can feel the energy I crave.

So now, I can relish being in the month of Elul, knowing what I know, and learning more all the time. I can spiritually prepare for the upcoming Holidays, grateful for this rung of the spiritual ladder I’m on, and hopeful to climb higher with each passing day.