So you’ve decided to dress as a princess

So you’ve decided to dress as a princess. Congratulations on a truly marvelous and frankly inspiring choice of costume. The glamor and regality you will bring to wherever you choose to spend your holiday will surely be something to behold and you should be commended for taking such a brave and unprecedented step.

Princess good, pirate bad (photo credit: Nati Shohat/Flash90)

Whether you choose to emulate a Disney princess, dressing in a vaguely historical approximation of Bavarian royal attire, or you choose to go the route tread by that most fabulous of modern princesses, Kate Middleton, and dress as an ultra-Orthodox boy, your costume will be sure to convey a sense of magic to whomever has the good fortune to behold you on this day.

“A princess!” they will exclaim. “Could it be that there is true royalty walking in our midst? It is worth it to abandon a sound democratic system just to gaze at her countenance.”

They will rush to put on their finest finery while in your presence. Don’t stop them. This is more for them than for you. Allow them to bask in your magnificence. It will warm their soul, and all because you made the excellent and novel choice that a princess is what you would be for Purim.

Indeed, by choosing to dress as a princess you are telling the world that you are a true trailblazer in costuming technology. The panache such an original costume carries is enough to make sure the world knows that even though you may not have royal blood coursing through your veins, for one day a year at least you are the queen of making believe.

Pittsburgh Steeler terrorist: Worst. (CC-BY Daveynin, Flickr)

Not like those pirates. We suggest you approach the nearest pirate and tell them that not only is their choice of costume unoriginal and uninspired; it is extremely offensive given the situation in Somalia. Make sure to ask them if they would want people dressing up as terrorists, or as one of the Pittsburgh Steelers. Nobody would stand for that, tell them, and neither should anybody have to stand for your offensive swashbuckling.

Make sure to curtsy. You are a princess, after all.