Surviving Nova: My fight to rebuild my life

On October 7, I went to celebrate life at the Nova Music Festival. Instead, I found myself running through fields under fire, trying to escape the deadliest terror attack Israel has ever known.

From the start, something felt off. The entrance kept getting delayed, and we only made it in at midnight. The main stage didn’t even open until 3 a.m. But once the music began, it was magical — hundreds of us dancing under the stars, surrounded by joy and freedom. For a few short hours, life was magical.

At 6:28 a.m., it all collapsed. A friend told me, “Look up.” Rockets streaked across the sky, leaving trails of smoke. Minutes later, we were told to disperse. Then the explosions came. We ran to our car and tried to escape, but every exit was jammed. Police redirected us into dead ends. At one point, we found ourselves driving straight toward a terrorist roadblock. They began shooting at us.

That’s when the nightmare became real. We saw a body ejected from a car. We made a U-turn, but every road led to more chaos, more danger. Finally, with nowhere left to go, we abandoned the car and ran through the fields.

We ran for over an hour, covered in dust, running on adrenaline, without water, without direction. One friend, who had served in the area, guided us. We stumbled onto a car and tried to drive, but confusion forced us to abandon it too. At last, after what felt like an eternity, we were rescued.

I survived. But survival is not the same as living.

Since that day, I have carried the weight of trauma. I was recognized as a terror survivor by Israel’s National Insurance Institute and began treatment for PTSD. I have mood swings. I have intrusive thoughts at work. At night, anxiety keeps me awake. I never experienced this before October 7. Life changes completely — and even something as simple as managing a business becomes a daily battle.

Before Nova, I was building my future. From a young age, I dreamed of being independent, of creating something of my own. I co-founded a business in security and surveillance systems, then shifted to the fast-growing field of electric vehicle charging stations. I studied anything that sparked my curiosity — body language, negotiation, entrepreneurship, real estate. But after Nova, I felt everything slipping away.

I’m grateful for a robust support system that has kept me going. Part of that support network was SparkIL, a platform that helps connect Diaspora Jews with Israeli small businesses, whose work is only possible due to global lenders and donors such as the Jewish Federations of North America, The Jewish Agency and Ogen. They gave me a boost when I needed it most. It helped me invest in my business and reminded me that even in difficult times, there are people rooting for you. 

Step by step, I am reclaiming pieces of my life. I don’t pretend that the journey is easy. Some days are darker than others. However, I hold on to hope and keep moving forward.

To anyone else fighting their own battles, my message is simple: We have to be strong. We can only rely on ourselves. And we must never stop moving.