Tears into Action: Remembering on October 7th

How do we commemorate October 7th, three years after the deadliest and most brutal attack in Israel’s history? No universal liturgy or ritual has yet taken shape to remember the murdered, the abducted, and the fallen soldiers. Living history will, in its own time, teach us how this day is to be remembered and made sacred.

We are all witnesses. Hamas made certain the world would have a front-row seat to its evil, as it unleashed meticulously planned, sadistic acts of terror on innocent people, young and old. We know with certainty what we saw with our own eyes, what we read, and what we heard from survivors themselves. The words of the Yom Kippur Martyrology give voice to what lives in my heart: “For these things I weep.”

Yet we are a people who, in every generation, have turned our tears into action.

On Simchat Torah, many made space, spiritually and emotionally, to remember the fallen, holding together “a time to mourn and a time to dance,” the words from Ecclesiastes embroidered on my synagogue’s Simchat Torah Project Torah mantle back at home. As I walk through Israel, for the short time that I am visiting, I see signs announcing gatherings of remembrance, evenings of song and story where friends and families will share the memories of those they loved. And there are many Israelis who are not yet ready to grieve together, who carry their trauma quietly within them and cannot yet find words for their personal and collective suffering.

Being in Israel at this moment has given me the privilege of mourning and remembering alongside the Israeli people. This evening, I stood with hundreds of Jerusalemites in Paris Square, in the heart of Jerusalem, where weekly protests were held throughout the war until every hostage came home. We heard from families of hostages and victims of terror, among them Sharon Sharabi, brother of Yossi z”l and Eli Sharabi, and Moshe Shapira, father of Aner Shapira z”l, who spent the final moments of his life saving those sheltering beside him, throwing back the grenades Hamas terrorists hurled inside.

If one thread ran through their words, it was this: we must honor the sanctity of life. Our unity is stronger than anything that divides us. We must cherish every precious moment of joy. And the families of the victims of terror still need us to carry on the fight for the honor and dignity of the people of Israel.

A moment of true holiness came when Rabba Tamar Elad-Appelbaum of Kehillat Zion offered an original prayer in the spirit of Yizkor. She spoke of the preciousness of life and the depth of our sorrow for those we have lost, and called on us to choose life fully.

Israelis will undoubtedly find their way through this difficult day by continuing on with infectious vitality – navigating the elections, news cycles and continuous thwarted attempts of terror.  But for those who are an ocean away, we must strive to tether ourselves to the bond of peoplehood. Perhaps we can find a way together towards memory infused with intention:

Light a candle. Tonight or tomorrow, kindle a memorial candle at home, and let it burn as a quiet witness for the 1,200 souls taken that day and for all who have fallen since.

Learn a name and a story. Choose one person who was murdered, taken hostage, or fell in defense of Israel. Read about who they were, what they loved, and how they lived. Share their story at your Shabbat table so that they are remembered as a life, not a number.

Give tzedakah or Purchase an Israel Bond – Support organizations that care for survivors, bereaved families, displaced communities in the south and north, and those living with the wounds of war, seen and unseen.

Do a mitzvah in their memory. An act of kindness, a visit to someone who is lonely, an hour of Torah study dedicated to a name: these are the ways our tradition has always transformed grief into blessing.

Show up. Come to communal gatherings, stand with our Jewish institutions, and stand firmly against antisemitism wherever it appears. Our presence is itself a statement that we will not be intimidated.

Stay connected to Israel. Call a friend or family member there. Plan a visit. Israelis tell us again and again how much it means to know they are not alone.

October 7th remains an open wound, so woven into our daily lives that we hardly need a day set aside to remember it. And still, today we pause to remember more deeply: to be more present, more compassionate, and more courageous in our Jewish lives. We pledge to honor those we lost by living our Judaism boldly, through acts of righteousness, kindness, and unwavering pride in the Jewish people.

Zichronam livracha. May their memories be a blessing and for righteous and compassionate action.