The Eternal Jew’s Tale, #186, Noah’s tale, 3

In this episode, the illusionist work of a Greek carpenter.

The Eternal Jew’s Tale
Twenty Second Era, Part 2, 1492 C.E., Constantinople

…“Kuftee is here!”…

Well, it don’t take long til Noah and Kleftees both realize words won’t work. ‘Come, come,’ Noah signals, and suspicious and slow Kleftees tails them back to the shack where it’s more dancin’ and pantomime with Yacoob addin’ a word now and then, and Kleftees kinda, sorta, perhaps understandin’ he’ll work for them to renovate this animal stall.

Now to get Hosaef to work, to purchase lumber and supplies.

“Maybe Kleftees knows someone.”

Sure enough. Not long after, rumble and clatter during the night, and morning, behold, a pile of planks, and Kleftees wearin’ new boots. Seems he knows a broker’s skills. But as for how to build a house, lay a footing, set a post, notch a beam, drive a nail, Kleftees don’t know squiddle squat, earnin’ Hosaef’s constant wrath.

And then one night, hey, what’s them sounds? Who’s drivin’ donkey carts in the lane? Morning, all the materials have disappeared, and where’s that useless Kleftees now?

In furious humor Noah goes to the city officials.

“Robbery! The night watchman! Where’s he been when all my lumber’s been stole from me? Where is the chief of the Janissaries or his soldiers who should be pertectin’ property?”

And it weren’t long til Noah finds he’s chained to a wall and facing a whip for reckless disorder and disrespect. Except for little Yacoob’s tears and his savvy pantomime to explain his papa’s intentions, who could guess the ends of Noah’s troubles that day? Of course, the copious bakshish he paid might have also helped secure his release. Half the night has come and gone and Noah leaves the gendarmery with a sleepin’ Yacoob in his arms.

How much trouble is a house worth? On many a morning Noah must chase indigent squatters out of his house, the smell of urine and excrement assaultin’ his nose and offendin’ his sense of law and order and ownership. And that night watchman! More than once he caught him rummagin’ in his house, stuffin’ a sack with tools and goods. But what can he do? The man’s a crook, and yet he can’t be accused or touched — he’s the bashi bostanci’s* sister’s son. And workmen come and workmen go. And as for lumber and material, he could have built three or four homes for all that was stole, in spite of the fact that he hired night guards to pertect the place. Maybe them guards been the very thieves.
* head of the city guard

Such frustrations and many more til Noah’s family dwelt in that house.

And in them days little Yacoob, who seen things no adult should ever see, become a workin’ lad of the world. Quickly proficient in Turkish and Greek, he translates for Noah and greases the wheels for him to find, bargain for, and buy supplies, then negotiate for delivery; also to coddle favor and slip bakshish to the night watchmen and their entourages of thieves, pimps, and such-like friends who like to use their house for themselves. He even become the chief diplomat between the warring factions of Jews, Sephardim and Romaniote. Wherever he walks, peace follows him. Who can be angry around such a lamb?

Like I says, one example might show the problems an immigrant and stranger might face, and the subtle struggles, the hidden castes, and the fights for privilege beneath the surface in the zimmi* world of these Ottomans.
* Turkish for ‘dhimmi’; the dhimma is the apartheid foundation of Islamic law

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In the next episode, Istanbul in the time of plague.