Moshe-Mordechai van Zuiden
Psychology, Medicine, Science, Politics, Oppression, Integrity, Philosophy, Jews -- For those who like their news and truths frank and sharp

The great variety of ways Orthodox Jews deal with a seemingly anti-Gay Tradition

In degrees from harsh to friendly to sound

Fresh in the news, frequently, Orthodox-Jewish authorities trashing Gays and their communities. Yet, not every Orthodox Jew thinks the same.

1. Gays just want to anger G^d and destroy Judaism and society.

All of G^d’s Commandments are holy and attainable. Those who can’t do it should take therapy until they can. Otherwise, they chose evil.

Problem with that approach is that most Orthodox-Jewish Gays seem angered by Jews and Judaism and G^d. It seems that the anger sits on the other side. And as small children, Gays are often more religious than their peers and the rest of their families.

Further, frequently, their personalities and relationships are exemplary for how to pray, love one’s partner, raise children, teach students, build communities, and be generous.

2. Gays can’t help themselves.

A problem is that many LGBTQs report finally being happy, content, and fulfilled when living the life of their choice, no different from heterosexual cis-gender people who live the life of their dreams, though no one likes the oppression and how hard it makes it for biological men to have children.

3. Who are we to judge?

The same approach as the present Pope. Always a bad sign when the parent religion (Judaism) doesn’t have more to offer than its child religions (Christianity, Islam, Modernity).

In principle, generally, we should judge people and G^d favorably. But if people happily violate Commandments, we should reproach them.

Our Prayers advise us to confess: “We deviated from Your good Commandments and Laws, but it has not benefited us.” So, when we see clear benefits of homosexual relationships, they can’t be universally sinful.

4. It’s between the Jew and his Maker

Certainly, sinning in public is far more serious than in the privacy of one’s home. But sinning is sinning, and we should not be nice about it if it is sinning. Private idol worship made us lose wars.

5. You’re a monster if you reject people like that

Civility and respect for others certainly speak of humility, our greatest virtue. And it prevents the worst sin which is degrading Judaism and G^d in the eyes of others. Still, as arguments, these are very weak.

6. The Torah meant something else than it says

That’s a tough thesis to prove. Sounds more like wishful thinking. “The Torah condemns homosexual intercourse because, then, it was often rape.” Makes no sense because it says that the penetrated is as guilty as the penetrator. Such an approach can’t be part of Orthodox Judaism.

One friend of mine, a Straight, legit Orthodox Rabbi, says: “I just disagree with condemning homosexuals. I reject what it seems to say in Leviticus. How I can do that as a rabbi? I have no alternative but to reject it.”

7. The role of the Rabbis is to give Jews a good life, not to judge them

Sidestepping the pull to judge is definitely more becoming than authorities trying to beat down innocent, vulnerable people.

8. Jewish Law was recently wrongly interpreted and the Torah misread

The injunction against homosexuality was largely a dead letter in Judaism until 60 years ago because it hardly existed. Rich Greek men often had young boyfriends on the side for sex and love. At wars, non-Jewish soldiers not rarely would rape enemy men and women. But Jews did not. Only in lewd times, the deciders of Jewish Law write, when everyone has sex with everything that moves and doesn’t, some Jews followed that trend.

In the Sixties, with Make Love, Not War, and, for the first time, with anti-conception splitting procreation from sex, then also Gay Lib emerged. The Rabbis then said: The old story of lewd times. But even the greatest rabbis then, Rabbis Kook and Feinstein concluded that at least in some cases, homosexuality seemed no lewd revolt but built into the person. (These writings are always concealed by the anti-Gay lobby.)

Recently, in the last 500 years, no new Jewish Law emerged that bans men from having sex with men. Just the old texts were interpreted wrongly.

The Torah actually forbids intercourse by a man with a man as with a woman. When it forbids bestiality, it doesn’t say As with a human. So, the basic meaning must be an Injunction against replacement homosexuality: Straight men who find it easier to sleep around with men than stick to and cleave to one wife. The Torah Injunction is only on Straight men.

This makes a lot of sense. There’s no shame on a guy needing to cling to a guy to break existential loneliness. Only ’emergency homosexuality’ is out because it wrecks family life of Straights and leads Straight men astray.

Have these arguments ready, even if no one wants to hear them. It is hard to be a proud Gay Jew or Ally to Gay Jews without knowing this by heart.


NB:  Jews’ religiosity does not predict (un)friendliness toward LGBTQ. We have ultra-Orthodox Jews who stand with LGBTQIA+, no questions asked. And there are Atheistic Jews, who shamelessly hate LGBTQIA+, basing themselves on … Leviticus. Some Straight women hate Gay men. Go figure.

About the Author
MM is a prolific and creative writer and thinker, previously a daily blog contributor to the TOI. He often makes his readers laugh, mad, or assume he's nuts—close to perfect blogging. He's proud that his analytical short comments are removed both from left-wing and right-wing news sites. None of his content is generated by the new bore on the block, AI. * As a frontier thinker, he sees things many don't yet. He's half a prophet. Half. Let's not exaggerate. Or not at all because he doesn't claim G^d talks to him. He gives him good ideas—that's all. MM doesn't believe that people observe and think in a vacuum. He, therefore, wanted a broad bio that readers interested can track a bit what (lack of) backgrounds, experiences, and educations contribute to his visions. * This year, he will prioritize getting his unpublished books published rather than just blog posts. Next year, he hopes to focus on activism against human extinction. To find less-recent posts on a subject XXX among his over 2000 archived ones, go to the right-top corner of a Times of Israel page, click on the search icon and search "zuiden, XXX". One can find a second, wilder blog, to which one may subscribe too, here: or by clicking on the globe icon next to his picture on top. * Like most of his readers, he believes in being friendly, respectful, and loyal. However, if you think those are his absolute top priorities, you might end up disappointed. His first loyalty is to the truth. He will try to stay within the limits of democratic and Jewish law, but he won't lie to support opinions or people when don't deserve that. (Yet, we all make honest mistakes, which is just fine and does not justify losing support.) He admits that he sometimes exaggerates to make a point, which could have him come across as nasty, while in actuality, he's quite a lovely person to interact with. He holds - how Dutch - that a strong opinion doesn't imply intolerance of other views. * Sometimes he's misunderstood because his wide and diverse field of vision seldomly fits any specialist's box. But that's exactly what some love about him. He has written a lot about Psychology (including Sexuality and Abuse), Medicine (including physical immortality), Science (including basic statistics), Politics (Israel, the US, and the Netherlands, Activism - more than leftwing or rightwing, he hopes to highlight reality), Oppression and Liberation (intersectionally, for young people, the elderly, non-Whites, women, workers, Jews, LGBTQIA+, foreigners and anyone else who's dehumanized or exploited), Integrity, Philosophy, Jews (Judaism, Zionism, Holocaust and Jewish Liberation), the Climate Crisis, Ecology and Veganism, Affairs from the news, or the Torah Portion of the Week, or new insights that suddenly befell him. * Chronologically, his most influential teachers are his parents, Nico (natan) van Zuiden and Betty (beisye) Nieweg, Wim Kan, Mozart, Harvey Jackins, Marshal Rosenberg, Reb Shlomo Carlebach, and, lehavdil bein chayim lechayim, Rabbi Dr. Natan Lopes Cardozo, Rav Zev Leff, and Rav Meir Lubin. This short list doesn't mean to disrespect others who taught him a lot or a little. One of his rabbis calls him Mr. Innovation [Ish haChidushim]. Yet, his originalities seem to root deeply in traditional Judaism, though they may grow in unexpected directions. In fact, he claims he's modernizing nothing. Rather, mainly basing himself on the basic Hebrew Torah text, he tries to rediscover classical Jewish thought almost lost in thousands of years of stifling Gentile domination and Jewish assimilation. (He pleads for a close reading of the Torah instead of going by rough assumptions of what it would probably mean and before fleeing to Commentaries.) This, in all aspects of life, but prominently in the areas of Free Will, Activism, Homosexuality for men, and Redemption. * He hopes that his words will inspire and inform, and disturb the comfortable and comfort the disturbed. He aims to bring a fresh perspective rather than harp on the obvious and familiar. When he can, he loves to write encyclopedic overviews. He doesn't expect his readers to agree. Rather, original minds should be disputed. In short, his main political positions are among others: anti-Trumpism, for Zionism, Intersectionality, non-violence, anti those who abuse democratic liberties, anti the fake ME peace process, for original-Orthodoxy, pro-Science, pro-Free Will, anti-blaming-the-victim, and for down-to-earth, classical optimism, and happiness. Read his blog on how he attempts to bridge any tensions between those ideas or fields. * He is a fetal survivor of the pharmaceutical industry (, born in 1953 to his parents who were Dutch-Jewish Holocaust survivors who met in the largest concentration camp in the Netherlands, Westerbork. He grew up a humble listener. It took him decades to become a speaker too, and decades more to admit to being a genius. But his humility was his to keep. And so was his honesty. Bullies and con artists almost instantaneously envy and hate him. He hopes to bring new things and not just preach to the choir. * He holds a BA in medicine (University of Amsterdam) – is half a doctor. He practices Re-evaluation Co-counseling since 1977, is not an official teacher anymore, and became a friendly, powerful therapist. He became a social activist, became religious, made Aliyah, and raised three wonderful kids. Previously, for decades, he was known to the Jerusalem Post readers as a frequent letter writer. For a couple of years, he was active in hasbara to the Dutch-speaking public. He wrote an unpublished tome about Jewish Free Will. He's a strict vegan since 2008. He's an Orthodox Jew but not a rabbi. * His writing has been made possible by an allowance for second-generation Holocaust survivors from the Netherlands. It has been his dream since he was 38 to try to make a difference by teaching through writing. He had three times 9-out-of-10 for Dutch at his high school finals but is spending his days communicating in English and Hebrew - how ironic. G-d must have a fine sense of humor. In case you wonder - yes, he is a bit dyslectic. If you're a native English speaker and wonder why you should read from people whose English is only their second language, consider the advantage of having an original peek outside of your cultural bubble. * To send any personal reaction to him, scroll to the top of the blog post and click Contact Me. * His newest books you may find here:
Related Topics
Related Posts