The Honeymoon Phase

Ah, the Honeymoon phase of a relationship. The most fun and exciting time. True love has come and slapped you in the face and knocked the wind out of you and it seems that life could get no better.  People around you are telling you that you have a special glow! (I got asked if my glow was love or pregnancy – the cheek of it!!) You and your new love are completely besotted with eachother and you feel #blessed.

Do you know why it is called the Honeymoon stage? I will tell you. Back in the olden days, by 3 months you would be married and going on your honeymoon. TA DA!!

Married after 3 months though? Who am I? Kim Kardashian? What can you REALLY know and learn about someone in 3 months?

I am with my boyfriend now for 8 months and every day I learn something new about him.

The Honeymoon phase is such a fun and exciting time where you have butterflies non stop. You then start to wonder, will this phase end and if so, when? Well, that will vary depending on the relationship.

Experts say that the Honeymoon Phase will end after 3 months and I say this too. Once you get to the 3 month stage, you should know if your other half ignites your soul on fire and still gives you butterflies – if so, keep them. If not, well you know it was a fun 3 months and off they trot!

But lets be honest, it is so hard transitioning from that time where all you want to do is be in their presence and rip their clothes off to having sex every other time you see eachother. One minute it is all ”no I love you, no you hang up, hehe you are so funny” to “babe, farting is natural and we should both be allowed to appreciate it!”

See, at first and let us not lie here, we all put on a bit of an act. We are never really ourselves to begin with. Yes, we are a version of ourselves but we learn to compromise with eachother because we want to and it is also the right thing to do but when the Honeymoon phase is over, you go back to your own baseline and sometimes, selfish ways are shown. After you both realise this is for real and you are past the 3 month stage will you truly get to know eachother, the good and the bad.

After some time, it all becomes ‘regular’ and ‘comfortable’ and reality sets in. You realise that it is not just a fling, it is real and and the actual realities of the relationship kick in. You start to think about the future, money etc and think ok this is it now? So, how do you know if you are happy with your partner after the Honeymoon phase is over and if it will last?

In my opinion if you can be totally yourself in front of your partner, be silly, have a bad hair day, overcome a sickness bug while they hold your hair whilst you are puking your guts up, tell them when they annoy you, be honest at all times, laugh like you never laughed before and enjoy them and their company, I think it is safe to say that you are past the honeymoon phase and into the next chapter of your lives together.

What I have learnt is that relationships take a lot of time and effort. They are not easy, but, if it is worth it then you fight to make it work, you do what it takes to make eachother happy, feel safe and loved.

About the Author
Lala Vak started blogging in 2010 joining the blogosphere with great power. With a blog nominated in both 2012 and now 2014 for the Cosmo Blog Awards, she is one to watch out for as she will say all the things you are thinking!
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