Her Majesty had a good secret giggle when We were entertaining the President and First Lady of Our runaway overseas territories that fancy to call themselves the United States of America.
We were relieved when he didn’t try his iron first on Us when We were shaking hands. One doesn’t want unnecessarily to let on that the Queen learned a little karate (forth dan).
One can’t help meeting Americans and wanting to show them who can smile for real. One has no choice but to out-smile them and it feels good.
Yes, he was a businessman and he went into politics with his cheap phony hair. He couldn’t get enough of the busbies of our guard of honour. We probably wanted to tell him that it’s not their real locks but then, We couldn’t break his heart so We didn’t.
The First Lady came in on stiletto heels. One would think that when one gets to meet a real nonagenarian Monarch, a little humility would go a long way. But then, One can’t help thinking that such people need to pump themselves up to feel any good. We pitied her, though, because it looks so uncomfortable. We couldn’t help but mutter under Our breath, Good for feminists who already 70 years ago, called this, anti-woman footwear.
More and more and more, the press seems to feel it legitimate to focus on what she’s wearing. What is she — a shop-window dummy?! Sometimes, One wonders if oppression will ever stop — especially sexism. People think that because One is Royal and old, One is oblivious and silly. But One wouldn’t want to be bothered at that thought either.
One can’t say much about politics but One can’t help feeling pride in the loud demonstration in front of the Palace before the banquet, against some of the things One’s guest has recently done or said. We had a peek at them from an upstairs window. The British People is a fine bunch.
The banquet and reception were exquisite again. And We thought We looked rather smart. One prizes One lucky with such a talented and dedicated staff. And The Donald “spoke” well.
I appreciate that Charles took over so much from Philip. It was high time at high tea to do so.
We should give it an entry in Our diary tonight.
I must say that I loved all of it. But especially the dinner. I told Melania that it reminded me of the banquets that she organizes: sheer perfection.
You would think that all these traditions and formalities would set you off laughing. But funnily, it works the opposite. You get the solemnity — is that actually a word?
Melania told me she loved the flowers. I hadn’t noticed them so much but yeah, it was special. Nice to be among people who treat you well.
And I sat next to the Queen and I can tell you, she is a very WARM and powerful woman. The Brits are lucky to have her. Though she’s probably not very loved. Stalked by paparazzi and slandered by fake media. The tragedy that greatness always goes attacked everywhere. But Melania is right — let’s not think about that now. I had a good time. I should twitter about it. You know what — I’ll ask them to make a video compilation.
Still, I’ll be happy to fly back soon. There’s no place like home.