Before we go into the numbers, let’s first clarify the names.
The present letter mix indicating Gay Oppression may have some golden nuggets to discover for many a bewildered reader. So, let’s explain.
L = Lesbian sexual orientation, identity, sex choices, romantic, lifestyle
G = Gay sexual orientation, identity, sex choices, romantic, lifestyle
B = Bisexual sexual orientation, identity, sex choices, Bi-gender identity
T = Trans-gender identity, hormonal/exterior sex choices
Q = Queer (mixed/flexible gender role) lifestyle, Questioning (don’t know)
I = Intersex
A = Asexual, A-gender, Cis-Straight Allies (to everyone here mentioned)
+ = No Label, Pansexual, Genderqueer, Polyamorous, Cross-dressing, etc.
The word Gay is frequently used for all of the above (except the Allies).
The Hater and the Liars
First, some good news. In the last year or so, we have seen a steep decline in self-righteous self-described pious men spewing hatred and lies about Gay people without any shame. It is tiring to continuously rehearse the same old bigotry. And they possibly realized how unbecoming that all is.
Unfortunately, the Orthodox-rabbinic self-declared defenders of Gays also stayed silent. All of them?! Why? I don’t know; it is beyond me.
Numbers of Gays and Allies
By conservative estimation, of all groups, some 5% is LGB+. This is known.
Less known is how many people have a first-degree LGB+ family member.
Let’s say (do you agree?) that most people have at least: themselves and one partner, 2 parents, 2 siblings, and 2 kids, together eight people. Each of them has a chance of at least 5% to being LGB+. The chance that at least one of these eight is LGB+ is then 0.95 times 0.95 times 0.95 times 0.95 times 0.95 times 0.95 times 0.95 times 0.95 = 33.6%. In words that means: on average, 1 in every 3 people has a first-degree LGB+ relative.
In a group like the Times of Israel bloggers of 10,000, that means that one can expect that 500 of them are LGB+. No, it is not a good idea to out anyone unless they are advocating anti-Gay measures and you know they are Gay themselves. This is the golden standard in the Gay community.
In a group of 10,000 people, one may then also expect that 3,300 of them have a first-degree LGB+ relative.
One cannot expect that each of them will write about LGBTQIA+ issues every time they blog. But at least, one should expect them to write about this once every ten posts, no? That would mean that 10% times 33% = more than 3% of the time, one may expect that a TOI blog post at least touches on LGBTQIA+ issues. That’s a couple of times a week, a dozen times a month. That’s not what we see. Why? I don’t know.
A Call to Action
We could say that things are getting better and a lack of public discourse doesn’t hurt. But that is not true. Young Gays commit suicide in staggering numbers still. You have a chance of 33% to have it happen to you, Heaven forbid. Gays who manage, suffer no less homophobia than Jews suffer antisemitism but only the latter make noise. There are still so many countries and communities where Gays cannot safely live their lives and choices. Gay rights are human rights. As we saw with #metoo and BLM, things don’t get cleaned up really until there is a mass movement against all of it. Do you want to be written about you: s/he secured a comfortable life? Indeed, no one should expose themselves to victimhood or martyrdom. But there should be many more people who can safely take a risk to speak out. And many more who can safely band together with others and take a stance for total equality of LGBTQIA+ people. Today still.
We don’t have to create news or write personal (sob or success) stories. Simply reporting and commenting on LGBTQ+ news is great already. Like these recent items: The IDF approves an LGBTQ Pre-Military Academy! And a Populist Rabbi says that the corona vaccine is made to turn people Gay. He has not proof, of course, and there are more indications that being Straight can make you stupid and cruel (I’m kidding, but only slightly so). So many news outlets are so slow or unwilling to bring LGBTQ+ news.