Aliyah: From Toronto to Tel Aviv via CDMX with Love (and Paperwork)!

My dearest Vera,

I just don’t know whom I can tell the good news. We have finally, after 18 months of complicated paperwork, first from Canada and then from Mexico, achieved our goal.

We are Olim! We have been accepted by the Eligibility Division of the Jewish Agency, and when we land on June 1, we will be landing as Israeli citizens. Even though I’m not Jewish, as you well know, I’m beyond thrilled. I cannot really crystallize this moment in simple words. I’m happy that we have met this achievement.

There were many hurdles due to our personal circumstances. Although, originally, we had a specific target date to go to Israel, we decided to delay our trip due to the war with Hezbollah.

Instead, on January 2^nd, we came to Mexico. Since Mexico was a new jurisdiction, we had to change Aliyah coordinators. Due to complications in getting all the documents and then getting the appropriate Apostilles, which involved sending documents back and forth to Canada, our original police check expired. Therefore, we had to seek out a Mexican lawyer who would do our prints – old-fashioned ink on paper – three copies for each of us – then resending that paperwork to a firm in Canada by DHL, only to be forwarded to the RCMP.  These RCMP checks are only valid for six months. Finally, after 18 months of pushing papers, sending emails, visiting agencies, government offices, and DHL offices, we have arrived at the finish line of a grueling marathon.  The prize was worth it.  The achievement was glorious.

This is literally all of our paperwork. Our case was a bit exceptional. However, the point is, we persevered and succeeded. Second photo, signing the final documents before the last stage: the Oleh 4A visa.

Simon has always felt so guilty about dragging me into this.  Often, usually in the early hours of the morning, he will be plagued with doubts.  Am I dragging Tom away from his family, friends, and second career into a war zone?  Will we be okay?  This is my problem.  Maybe we should have stayed in Canada.  

Then another news story would pop up about what is happening in Canada, and after reading them, he feels relieved. He knows he’s done the right thing.  Recent headlines have been:

• The Jewish Chronicle, 1 May 2025:  Vivian Bercovici – A Cold Wind blows through Canada’s Jewish Communities (Readership: 900,000)
• Times of Israel, 5 May 2025:  Government report accuses West of bolstering antisemitism by criticizing Israel – Diaspora Ministry dubs Canada ‘champion of antisemitism,’ tying Trudeau’s condemnation of military action in Gaza to 670% spike in anti-Jewish incidents. (Readership:  64.2 million)
• The National Post, 6 May 2025. ‘You can’t be openly Jewish at TMU,’ students say. (Readership: 300,000)
• The Free Press, 7 May 2025:  A Pogrom Is Brewing in Canada (readership 1.25 million)
• The National Post, 7 May 2025:  FIRST READING: Ottawa hired a U.K. contractor to monitor pro-Israel social media posts
• The National Post,10 May 2025: Interview with author Douglas Murray:  “Canada has disgraced itself”

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Once the antisemitic graffiti started appearing in our neighborhood, that was it. He’d always identified as a Canadian. Being Jewish was incidental. But as the saying goes: You don’t choose Judaism, it chooses you.  

If you remember, we live just across the river from Bridgepoint Hospital which belongs to the Mount Sinai Hospital group.  It’s no coincidence that in front of this hospital, spray-painted Stars of Davids, dripping with blood, with slogans of Soaked in Blood! suddenly appeared. Gerrard is a busy street with lots of foot traffic, many bus stops and streetlights. Apparently, the vandals were not deterred.

Graffiti in front of Bridgepoint Hospital, part of the Mount Sinai Group of Hospitals, Toronto, Canada, November 2023

At first, we kept pivoting between Mexico and Israel. Mexico only popped up as an alternative since it seemed safer than moving into a conflict zone. It’s also relatively much closer and seemed fairly unaffected by antisemitic prejudice, probably since it has such a strong Catholic identity. Nevertheless, we received a lot of criticism by the same cast of characters about how dangerous Mexico was, as well.

I kept on wearing you down with all my questions – my ambivalence, my doubts, my what-if scenarios. What will it be like to take on a new country as a permanent home at this point in our lives?  It’s not easy to make a seemingly permanent change to a new country, and a new culture.  Which is the better fit?  What are the advantages and disadvantages of each location?   Thank you for your patience in all of this. It turned out that going to Mexico City was the easier first step.

Outside of Canada, we felt our stress levels decrease. There was always a mounting tension in Toronto as every day, some odious activity would pop up and would go unchecked by politicians and police.  We could no longer bear the dread of what we may see around the next corner.

Maybe I’m a little bit too naïve and somewhat quixotic, but from my point of view, I’m elated upon the receipt of this email from our Aliyah advisor. I feel a weight lift off my chest. I feel like I can breathe.

I feel like I’ve put my money where my mouth is. Over my life, I’ve had to do a lot of self-reflection and decode my own personal antisemitism. I had a further distance to go as my parents were ethnic Germans, and I was influenced by my father’s Holocaust minimization and a bit of revisionism. I thought I was in the clear, then I met and married Simon and realized I had more work to do, as some of these antisemitic tropes have been so normalized in the fabric of Western society.

Simon walking through the Holocaust Memorial to the Murdered Jews of Europe, Berlin, 2015

I cannot believe how naïve I was about it all. I had concluded, through our visits to Berlin, that antisemitism was a thing of the past. The Germans had committed the biggest depravity but had owned it and done a lot of work in reconciling it. I thought Germany had atoned for the sins of the world because no country was innocent – so many turned away the Jews, including Canada. However, I soon discovered that there was just such a thin veneer that covered Jew Hate. All it needed was permission to erupt again.

As Simon’s father had said to him: There has never been more than 50 to 70 years of peace before Jews face once again that age-old hate. I was sickened by what I was seeing. I thought we had already reached the bottom, but each day I spotted a new way to be an antisemite. Then, some people dressed it up as a virtue. Antizionism is just code for antisemitism.

Simon kept the Jewish Book of Days from his father’s library, after Stan passed away.

I may not be able to convince people that they are surrounded by individuals who have innate, unrecognized antisemitism. In my opinion, Canada has amplified its systemic racism, also known as its “racism with a smile”. Although polite in their delivery, exclusion of and micro-aggressions against Jews and Jew allies have become common place.

However, my willingness to leave a country which I feel no longer serves or protects me or my husband to go to a country of my choice certainly makes a statement. Although Israel will always be under an existential threat and vilified, our willingness to move so close to a conflict zone should give other Canadians pause to think that something is afoot in the world and Canada is not immune to this change.

Israel is far from perfect, but it is human and decent. It has fought hard to gain its place back in the world. It just had Yom Ha’Atzmaut, Independence Day – 3,000 years old and 77 years young. The Jews have defied the odds and are one of the few, if not the only, people to reclaim its indigeneity.

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As of the last Canadian election, I reached a breaking point. I had already given up on the silent majority months ago. However, I realized that I was certainly wasting my time trying to hammer out logical arguments with intelligent, but vocal and opinionated, colleagues and friends. There was no bending their convictions; they strongly believed everything they saw in their preferred news source or on social media, fed by an algorithm they have curated. Not once did they question news sources nor sought out alternative sources. Acceptable antisemitic euphemisms had safely entrenched themselves in the mainstream of Canadian ideological dialogue – genocide, apartheid, colonialism, globalize the intifada! Stray from that narrative, and you risk being cancelled, at best, or berated in a public forum, at worst.

After a respected teacher colleague, Trudy, now retired, used the typical blood libels and the double standard that only applies to Israel, to prove her pro-Palestine position, she continued to slander the only political party who had taken a stance against antisemitism.  “They are anti-Arab, anti-Islam, anti-Palestinian, misogynistic, homophobic as well as cheats and frauds.”  Her condescension in a public forum in front of our work friends was uncalled for. As a tactic commonly used by bullies, it was an excessively aggressive act whose only purpose was to silence me on threat of being cancelled. Obviously, there was little room for a difference of opinion or reasonable discussion.

Well, Vera, can you blame me for flying off the handle with Trudy, going into a flame war on Boomerbook aka, the Ministry of Likes? Eventually I ended up blocking her and many of the people of our demographic – retired teachers. I had detected overtones by other friends and colleagues that made me suspicious. Many of my friends were willing to overlook the covert antisemitism in their chosen political party. Their newly appointed leader, who had never held public office, is hailed the new savior against the Trump threat. Maybe I’m just paranoid. You know me and my flaws far too well.

I’ve become greatly cynical by what I’m seeing happening in Canada. As you’ve said before about me, not only do I see the glass as half empty but there’s a crack in the glass and it’s leaking. People ask me if I miss home. Do I miss Canada? Maybe I miss the Maple Leaf Nation that existed before October 7, but I no longer recognize the new Canada. So much has changed. Political silence, at best, has emboldened the alleged protestors. I like to think of them as agitators.

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Simon and I can’t be crazy, though. We are one of many. Aliyah applications have increased in many countries. Canada is not the highest, but ranks second at 87%, behind France which is up an amazing 355%. Shame on France! The United Kingdom is third at 64% while the United States is fourth at 63%. It seems that there is as many people fleeing Israel as there is people “coming home” – that’s what Aliyah means. I just hope that it’s a net zero effect.

Currently, I’m very happy living in Mexico. It’s close to family members living in Canada as it is a four and half hour fight. I speak the language. I appreciate the culture. Never having visited this country before, I was unaware of the depth and breadth of Mexican industry, culture, and pride. They are an incredibly polite people who have a much higher acceptance of the “invaders” from other countries. Nevertheless, they are strong, resilient, and undeterred. The silent invasion of expats is far too weak to withstand the cultural fortress of the Mexicans.

Yesterday I was walking around Condesa and the Parque de Mexico and felt sad. I will truly miss this place. After 5 months of thinking of this place as home, I’m going to venture to say a part of my heart will always be in Mexico.

Mother’s Day, May 10, 2025, Parque de Mexico, Condesa, Mexico City

I may be far too romantic about it all, but I will not underestimate the Israelis. The Sabras, their nickname, are prickly on the outside but sweet and juicy on the inside.  Israelis are empathetic and passionate but must always be on their guard. How can they keep their head up in the face of so much? So much hate – to be the victim and yet to be criticized by the world.  To have unity as a country and people despite the chaos of the current government.

Sabras: Cactus cluster, Tiberius – Russian Dolls of famous figures, a shop window in Tel Aviv, October 2022

I already have friends in Israel. How is that possible? Well, there are other Canadians who have taken Aliyah, as well I’ve connected with fellow artists who live there. There is also Simon’s family. Cousins Katie and the other Simon are very welcoming. It’s quaint how they’ve maintained their British accents though they had immigrated when they were children. I guess their only auditory model were their parents, Uncle Harry and Aunt Jackie. I’m still trying to figure out how Jackie could be a Scottish Jew. That’s about as rare as being a Sudbury, Ontario Jew. Simon!  Hahaha.

I’m proud to be somewhere in the world, even a place that is constantly under an existential threat, knowing that this is the one place where Jew Hate is not tolerated. Israel is far from perfect but then again, no country is ever even near that standard. It’s only Israel that’s held up to that higher standard.

Here are my fantasies upon arriving in Israel. I have this revival of my faith, either due to my age or by living in the Holy Land. I hope it’s not the onset of Jerusalem Syndrome – you know the one where people transform into religious zealots. Kick me if you ever hear me quoting scripture. I will go to Saint Peter’s church, on the coast of the Mediterranean, which now faces Rome.

הכותל המערבי
The Western Wall, October 2022

I can pick up my photography again, after a year’s hiatus. I was left drained financially and emotionally due to years of expensive solo shows. I’ve lost patience with the arts and gay communities in Canada as I felt betrayed by their sudden antizionist stances. All of this has left me totally uninspired. However, now I’ve recovered that inspiration. I can’t wait to get back to the Israel museum as well as the National Library of Israel to take some pictures, the source images for my lens-based art.

My only true regret. I do leave behind one daughter, Julia, who will miss me dearly.  Mexico was already far enough for her, and she had hoped it was temporary. My heart breaks for that but I’m trying to show her that distance is relative and shortened by real-time texting and videocalls. No longer are we at the mercy of sending onion skin paper letters through the post office.  As well, there are also all sorts of meeting points halfway in Europe; we’ll be meeting in Germany for a cousins’ reunion. Furthermore, I will still come to Canada for visits. I know I can count on you to be there for her.

Vera, to be honest, Simon isn’t dragging me unwillingly to Israel. I feel he has rescued me. I would be so unhappy in this new Canada. The culture shock of seeing a society flip upside down onto its head, where even subtle antisemitic language is normalized would not sit well with me.

I ‘m leaving the safety of Canada, which is only safe for some, to embark on a precarious adventure. Check back with me in four months. I may be full of regrets, or I may have found a new home with a supportive community and friends.  It is a cautious hope. At least I know that I’ll find some poppyseed pastries in Israel: Hamantaschen and Mohnkuchen!!!  The Mexicans make a great croissant, but they stopped exploring baking options just short of the border to central Europe. Most of the Jews in Mexico are Sefardim (great food and desserts) and not Ashkenazim (Poppyseeds that conjure up memories of my mom!)

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So what if there’s an air raid siren, we have a “Mamad” (a reinforced room in the apartment). Mexico City is sinking and susceptible to earthquakes. At least, I’d rather face those types of risks than live in a home where Simon would have to either hide his identity or “know his place.”

And now—onto Israel! As Captain Kirk, another Canadian Jew, would say: Ahead warp factor nine, Mr. Sulu!

 Love always,

Tom