Dear Lockdown, I miss you already…

(pexels)
(pexels)

You’ve barely started to leave us and I miss you already!

When you were here, we had lots of quiet time at home.

When you were here, we were allowed to walk only 100 meters and I walked more than I did in years.

When you were here I had more time to relax. I read articles about how wonderful you are, about how much better the world is now. Thanks to you we had time to think, to be together, to read, to see lectures, films and plays on the internet… We saw videos about how nature itself is recovering…

We learned to shop online, to talk online, to study online. I worried more about the health of the internet more than I worried about my own health!…

People started calling me for no reason, just to ask me how I’m feeling. I called others as well.

I am over 65 and they told me that I’m old, that I’m in a risk group… I got a call from my Kupat Cholim, other organizations called me, my Rabbi called me. Do you need anything? Do you need someone to bring you food? Medications?

They didn’t do their homework. They seemed to think that I live alone and not with my family. Still, it was great to be remembered.

The children enjoyed being home. Their boredom finally defeated Netflix and they discovered other pastimes: learning to play the guitar, starting an exercise program, learning how to cook, painting the house… and even helping mom and dad!

Life was good!

And now? What will happen to us after you leave us, my sweet Lockdown? What will happen to the country? To the world? To nature? Will the world be too busy again? Too polluted? Too noisy? Will people stop worrying about each other? Will people stop talking, stop calling? Soon we’ll need to use the car again. Soon we’ll need to fill up the gas tank again. And I don’t like it. I like walking just 100 meters…

And I’m also scared!

For two months they’ve been telling me that I am old and at risk; that I must stay home; that I mustn’t meet people, not even family. Suddenly they are opening everything: stores, schools, gyms, parks…

But what about me? I am still over 65… I am still at risk… the coronavirus is still here, there is still no cure and no vaccine… Suddenly they allow me to go out… But how dare I go out, after they spent two months convincing me that that would be risking my life? And to top it all, they are already promising a second wave of the coronavirus, which will be much worse than the first. And that it may happen next fall (September)… or as soon as next week!

When I was in paratroop course I heard a joke: if your main parachute doesn’t open, don’t worry, you can open your reserve parachute. If the reserve parachute also doesn’t open, don’t worry, there is an ambulance waiting for you at the bottom…

That’s how I feel now… No medication, no cure, no vaccine, no end to the pandemic. You’re still at risk. But don’t worry. If you get sick, we’ll have an ambulance for you…

Please don’t leave us, my dear, sweet Lockdown. I miss you already…

David Wolf

May 2020

About the Author
David Wolf writes about his experience of being a second-time husband and father. He has a daughter from his first marriage, and, with his second wife, has accrued three daughters, two sons-in-law, one grandchild and twin 8-year-old sons. He is a social worker in a mental health department and in private practice in Raanana.
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