Distracted after Four Encounters
Full first day in Porto. Tired, we joined an afternoon walking tour. Dropped out early. But joined long enough to identify that couple, close to our age, American Jews from Scottsdale. She, the daughter of German Jewish Shoah survivors. She once lived on kibbutz. Israel is important to them. First saying I was from Philadelphia, feeling safe, I added, “but we live in Israel.” She accurately mimicked my embarrassed expression. It disturbed her, because she understands why it’s hard to be proud to be Israeli. She was as anxious to hear about our lives since October 7 as I was to hear how a stranger, yet an American Jew, my contemporary, sees things.
Coincidentally, we met the next day walking by the river. She had shared details of our previous discussion with her husband. Following small talk about politicians, she described her childhood as the daughter of survivors. With sensitivity, in this fleeting encounter, I felt I could be candid even if perceived as provocative. Israel becoming accountable for genocide in Gaza. I said it. Their reactions, contrary to my stereotyped impressions of American Jews (like most Israelis) adamantly refuting such terms, showed they confront this as it is. Perhaps because of the media, as it is. As it is not in Israel.
She is saddened by undeniable genocidal acts committed by Israel. Like me, baffled how a people with our history, become a state, perpetrates genocide, victimized though we were on October 7, with Hamas and Islamic Jihadists violating Israelis taken hostage. She seemed equally sad and concerned about antisemitism in the US. The release of the hostages woven back into the conversation. Biden failing to have the power over Bibi that Trump does. Regardless, indicative of Israeli impotence. Stark contrast to the idea that the State of Israel was to be the international insurance policy for the safety of all Jews. Israel needed a US president to save Israelis. To save us from our own leaders? (Of course we need support of other strong governments. We know the current government adversely affects the matter.)
We mentioned Mamdani. Didn’t weigh in on that when friends ask. Not well enough informed. I understand fears he’s anti-Israel, antisemitic, and claims that he denies Israel’s right to exist as a Jewish state. Similarly, I understand Jews who justified support for him. If he reflects their self-criticism, it doesn’t turn it into self-hate. There were other issues on the table, anyway. And maybe Mamdani’s stands are evolving as did those of Yitzchak Rabin.
The only unequivocally striking thing to me is the apparent Jewish community willingness to invest Mamdani with the power to be another focus of divisiveness. Or is a polarized Jewish community projecting onto Mamdani divisiveness generated by the Prime Minister of Israel? Is it similarly linked to Trump’s interests?
Another day in Porto, a day excursion to the Douro Valley, wine tasting and a short river cruise. Once again, hesitation, embarrassment, and my apologetic tone saying we’re from Israel, and we are not our government. A British couple at our table wine tasting still suggested we eat lunch together. This couple, a bit older than us, both retired military professionals. She proudly showed us a pen with “Israeli Air Force” inscribed on it. Received in gratitude from young Israeli Air Force cadets years ago at a conference she hosted.
Our young guide that day, from Portugal, raised in Luxembourg, equally understanding of the idea that we are not our government. He is worried about his. We asked each other how bad it must get before it gets better.
Checking a menu one evening on the door of a Porto café, a Jewish couple from Brazil overheard us speaking. In Hebrew, they said, “It’s the first time we’ve heard Hebrew here.” We confirmed the same experience, at first thinking them to be Israelis. They said how sad it is not to hear Hebrew, because they understand Israelis are afraid to speak Hebrew in public. It’s true, Israelis are warned to be cautious, though it’s also a bit past the usual season for massive travel abroad from Israel.
Another Porto day we looked for Rua de S. Miguel, as we looked for Rua da Judiaria in Lisbon. In both cities, where the Jews resided before the Inquisition. In Porto, on the outside wall of the church around the corner there, a sign in Portuguese, with a word in Hebrew acknowledging commemoration. We read in advance that the Portuguese text is an apology by the Church to the Jewish community.
I texted that anecdote with photos to a friend (unaware of my travels) in response to him texting me his most recent publication about Israel and Gaza. Reacting, he wondered if Israel, in 500 years will apologize to the people of Gaza? We agree, it should, sooner.
Distracted. Just because Jews did not perpetrate an attack against Nazi Germany and were only victims, does not void Israeli actions against Gaza following the Hamas attack against Israel of their genocidal character.
But then – in unintentional observation of self – that pang reappeared. My routine interpersonal contact with West Bank Palestinians reduced since switching jobs in March. By chance, I read a post reporting on a former Palestinian colleague speaking in Germany, at a site commemorating World War II atrocities. She spoke there with an Israeli counterpart. Reportedly, she hopes some day at a comparable spot in Gaza, a hospital bombed by the IDF will, rebuilt, be a site where Israel memorializes innocent lives it has taken there. Multiple internal triggers activated. Sharing her hope. Also hoping the Palestinian people will have a government condemning Hamas crimes. Innocent people killed. A hospital Israel bombed because it sheltered terrorists. Avoidable. There are alternatives. Needing reminders of the whole picture. Needing apologies. They don’t bring back lives. They forge reconciliation.
Harriet Gimpel — November 9, 2025
