How You Make Your Decisions

“Get me Amit’s family on the phone! I won’t breathe until I speak to Amit’s family!” Amit, a 22-year-old paramedic, was murdered on October 7, 2023 by Hamas enemies-of-peace (this describes them as well as ‘terrorists’). From his hospital bed, our patient reached Amit’s mom during Shiva. “Listen, without your daughter I wouldn’t be alive”(One Day In October, P. 85).

He described everything Amit did for him, from the soft sheet she placed under his head, to her calming words as she stroked his head. And then he said, “In the midst of all that hell, Amit was my little piece of heaven. And thanks to the girl you raised, I’m alive.” 

Amit’s mom treasured the call. There were others like it. Given all she learned and the messages Amit had sent her, she realized there were at least two times when Amit could have saved herself, but chose not to, in favor of doing all she could to help. When she was found, there was nothing left in her bags of medical supplies. They were empty, down to the last band-aid. Amit understood what it means to sacrifice for something larger and more lasting than herself. 

“They couldn’t listen to Moses,” we read in this week’s portion of Torah “because their spirits were crushed by cruel bondage” (Ex. 6:9). Ever since, alas, spirit-crushing cruelty, hasn’t left us. Again and again through history, it’s been part of our story. And yet, a portion of Torah that opens with an inability to heed God’s liberating promise, does fitfully find its way from darkness toward light.  

The past week opened with a touching-sensation we all felt when we beheld the mother-daughter hugs for Romi, Emily, and Doron. It’s the very opposite sensation of a crush-spirit. It’s a soothing, glowing one. This too is part of our story. As we relentlessly insist upon the liberation of 94 more, as we pray to our Source of Strength, we long for spirit-elevating moments ahead.

What Amit understood can be summed up like this: there comes a time in your life when you realize that self-interest and bodily-pleasure aren’t the only vantage points from which decisions should be made. The needs of your people. Your irreplaceable constellation of skills and circumstances. Your commitment to what outlasts you. These too are the vantage points from which your decisions should be made. When you do so, your life pulsates with purpose. 

“She had so many dreams.” Amit’s mom concludes, “All that’s left of her dreams is her story.” That story is what’s now left for us too. May it inspire us to dream.