Life Would Be Nothing Without Her

Rabbinic midrashim are often inspired by the juxtaposition (semikhat parashiyot) of biblical narratives. Parshat Hayei Sarah opens with the account of the death and burial of Sarah, Avraham’s wife, partner, and confidante. Immediately following this episode, the Torah describes Avraham’s condition in these words:

Avraham was now old, advanced in years, and the Lord had blessed Avraham in all things. (Genesis 24:1)

This seemingly straightforward observation inspired a midrashic eulogy reflecting on the rich and expansive life Avraham and Sarah shared, as well as the triumphs and vicissitudes they experienced together. Using Eshet Hayil (“A Woman of Valor”), the alphabetic acrostic poem describing a wife’s virtues that concludes Sefer Mishlei (the Book of Proverbs) as its literary backdrop, the midrash offers a retrospective on their remarkable and adventurous life together:

And Avraham was old, and well stricken in years (Genesis 24:1). Scripture states elsewhere: “A virtuous woman is a crown to her husband” (Proverbs 12:4). This verse alludes to Avraham, who mourned for Sarah, as it is written previously: “And Sarah died” (Genesis 23:2). Avraham began to weep for her, saying: “A woman of valor who can find? For her price is far above rubies. The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her” (Proverbs 31:10). When did he demonstrate his trust in her? When he said to her: “Say, I pray you, you are my sister” (Genesis 12:13). “She does him good and not bad all the days of her life” (Proverbs 31:12). “She looks for wool and flax” (Proverbs 31:13) alludes to her decision to separate Yitzhak and Yishmael when she said to her husband: “Cast out this bondwoman and her son” (Genesis 21:10). “She is like the merchant ships” (Proverbs 31:14), for Sarah was taken to Pharaoh’s house (Genesis 12:15), and later Avimelech sent her away. “She rises while it is still night” (Proverbs 31:15). When did that happen? When Avraham rose early in the morning (Genesis 22:3), at the time of the binding of Yitzhak. “She considers a field and buys it” (Proverbs 31:16). She thought about the field of Machpelah and acquired it. [This midrash asserts that Sarah actually acquired the burial plot!] Ultimately, she was buried there, as it is said: “And after this, Abraham buried Sarah, his wife” (Genesis 23:19). “She girds her loins with strength” (Proverbs 31:17). When did that happen? When the angels appeared, as it is said: “And Avraham went into the tent unto Sarah” (Genesis 18:6).

“She sees that her business thrives” (Proverbs 31:18). This refers to the time when the kings attacked them, as it is written: “And he divided himself against them by night” (Genesis 14:15). “She sets her hand to the distaff” (Proverbs 31:19), by providing food to passersby. “She reaches out to the needy” (Proverbs 31:20), for she gave charity and clothed the naked. “She is not afraid of the snow for her household” (Proverbs 31:21); that is, she did not fear Gehenna (the netherworld). And why not? “Because her entire household possessed crimson garments” (ibid.). The word shanim (crimson) is read as a play on shnayim (two), referring to Shabbat and circumcision, mitzvot thought to protect one from the netherworld. “She maketh covers for herself” (Proverbs 31:22): These were the priestly garments. “From the fruit of her hand she planted a vineyard” (Proverbs 31:16). This refers to Israel, as it is said: “For the vineyard of the Lord of hosts is the house of Israel” (Isaiah 5:7). “Her husband is known in the gates” (Proverbs 31:23); that is, when he pleaded with the sons of Het: “Give me a possession of a burial place” (Genesis 23:4). “She makes linen garments” (Proverbs 31:24) refers to circumcision, as it is said: “The counsel (sod) of the Lord is with them that fear Him” (Psalms 25:14). [A play on the words sadin (linen garments) and sod (secret), with circumcision understood as one of the secrets of Jewish identity.] “Strength and dignity are her clothing” (Proverbs 31:25) alludes to the clouds of glory that encircled her tent. “She opens her mouth with wisdom” (Proverbs 31:26). When did that happen? When she said to Avraham: “Consort with my handmaid” (Genesis 16:2). “She oversees the ways of her household” (Proverbs 31:27) indicates that she watched every day for the return of the angel who had informed her: “I will certainly return to you” (Genesis 18:10).

“Her children rise up, and call her happy” (Proverbs 31:28), as she said: “Who would have said unto Avraham that Sarah should give children suck? For I have borne him a son in his old age” (Genesis 21:7). “Many daughters have done well” (Proverbs 31:29) refers to the nations, “but you surpass them all” (Proverbs 31:29) alludes to Sarah, as it is said: “Look unto Abraham, your father, and to Sarah, that bore you” (Isaiah 51:2). “Give her of the fruit of her hand” (Proverbs 31:31), for it is said: “And the life of Sarah was a hundred and twenty and seven years.” And when she died, old age came upon him. “And Avraham was old, and well stricken in years.” (Tanhuma, Hayei Sarah 4)

This midrash does more than celebrate Sarah’s virtues. By weaving virtually every verse of Eshet Hayil into the story of her life, it offers a retrospective on the partnership that shaped the destiny of the Jewish people. Sarah was not simply Avraham’s wife, accompanying him through the extraordinary adventures of his life. She was his partner in building a family, forging a people, and establishing a legacy of faith and commitment that would endure for generations. Perhaps this is what the midrash wants us to understand when it places Avraham’s old age immediately after the account of Sarah’s death. Avraham may have been blessed in all things, but the fullness of his life was inseparable from Sarah. Only after losing her could he fully appreciate just how much of what he had accomplished, and who he had become, was bound up with her. His life was blessed in all things, but in large part it was on account of his partnership with Sarah.