Dana Janine Diamond

Sorry, Not Sorry

I had this one friend who has been an adamant Trump supporter. We managed to stay civil. I kept wondering when she would finally say, enough. He insulted everything she stands for, but still she supported him.

This weekend, I condemned his bragging about sexually assaulting women — as any decent human being should. She blocked me. Even though I ignored her hate-ridden posts about Hillary for months.

It’s for the best. I thought surely she would see the light, stand up for women and girls. Her business is based on serving women with breast cancer. You know, many of them have those “big, phony t*ts” her sick candidate likes to disparage. But, no, she doubled down.

So here it is. If you forgive or excuse an admitted sexual predator then you are not my friend, and you seek harm to me and my daughter. And I do not forgive you. Because saying “Sorry” is not the path to seeking forgiveness. It’s just the tiniest blip.

Demonstrating real and longstanding reform, making amends to those you’ve harmed, keeping the focus on yourself and you alone…and so much more. That is the path to redemption and forgiveness.

Anyone who excuses and forgives Trump automatically should ask themselves…is forgiveness mine to give? Am I betraying women and girls and boys who were raped and molested? Am I speaking out for the most vulnerable and injured in our society?

Or am I slapping a band-aid on a gaping wound in our horrible rape culture? By going along, throwing women and girls under the bus, am I just more of the problem rather than having the courage to be part of the solution? If you say Trump should be in charge of our powerful nation, you are signalling to every rapist and abuser and predator everywhere, have at it.

So far, the news has not reported Trump’s donation to any organization such as RAINN, which helps survivors of sexual assault, or any other like it. Before you are so quick to ‘forgive’, have you done anything to help the many victims throughout our country?

This should not need reiterating, but apparently it does. A wife is not synonymous with or property of her husband. She is her own person, and in Hillary Clinton’s case, an extraordinarily accomplished and caring person. Trump is not remotely her equal. She has dedicated her life to helping women and girls. Trump has devoted his life to preying upon them.

To further my feminist goals for our society, here is my pledge to you. If Bill Clinton embarrasses her or our country again, I hope she throws his sorry ass out of the White House. As President of the United States, I expect her to respect all women, every girl watching. In this 24/7 news environment, we have not seen him embroiled in any scandal in decades. I hope he has changed, because we need change.

I want Hillary Clinton running this country. I have faith in her and the strides women will make with her at the helm. But if she puts up with any more crap from him, I will not support her. I want a feminist in charge.

Because I support a culture free of misogyny. And free of misandry, too. Because this misogynistic dialogue between men hurts men and boys, too. I want a real change, and it starts in the hearts and minds of everyone, and certainly with the leader of the free world.

About the Author
Dana is a Jewish feminist, writer and poet. She is passionate about kindness, spirituality, the artist's voice, and speaking out for the vulnerable. She lives in New York.
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