The Onion hires Hamas writer

Famous satire and humor magazine, “The Onion” recently decided to staff Hamas activist Mahmud Abu Tawfiq to write what they deemed a funny take on Birthright. The Onion’s Editor In Chief Heinrich Vodenplatz thought it would be a good idea. “I came across this magazine Der Sturmer and they had some hilarious stuff about Jews taking over the world, some really well illustrated cartoons about Jews with big noses sucking the blood out of Christian children, stuff like that, and when I showed it to the rest of the staff here at The Onion we all thought it was really great. That’s when we tried to find someone who could really accentuate that kind if humor. Reinhardt, who has a cubicle in the corner, said he knew this guy Mahmud who was hilarious, and we brought him in for an interview.”

After contacting Mahmud, he was overjoyed at the appointment. “I really wanted to try and blur the lines between satire and slander and the Onion was way into that. They’re really funny over there so it was a huge notch on my belt career wise when they decided to publish my article about a girl on Birthright seeing dead Palestinians in the street. The guys back in Gaza are planning a party for me and maybe even an honorary stabbing of a small girl on my behalf. It’s a huge honor!”

While some people didn’t find the article particularly amusing, the staff at the Onion defended its release based on the timing of the article. It followed news of recent rioting along the Gaza Israel border where thousands of Palestinians backed by Hamas, rushed the border causing the Israeli army to respond killing some known terrorists, and according to Hamas, injuring 1400 people. Eva Guttenraus, another Onion writer championed the article. “We know that there’s no way, that CNN had time to confirm 1400 injuries within an hour of this happening, but come on, who cares?! Funny is funny, and a Birthright girl seeing dead Palestinians is laugh out loud stuff. It ranks right up there with when I wrote one about Jews in concentration camps having the trendiest diets. I titled that one ‘Thin is in!’… Hilarious!

When asked if The Onion will continue to satire the current conflict in the Middle East, Heinrich confirmed that they will continue to churn out the hilarity that came along with hiring Mahmud. We can all only hope so!

About the Author
Avi Liberman is a stand-up comic who was born in Israel, raised in Texas and now lives in Los Angeles. Avi founded Comedy for Koby, a bi-annual tour of Israel featuring some of America's top stand-up comedians.
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