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Gevalt! Oy Vey Iz Mir!—The Neo-Nazis Are Learning Yiddish—Satire

TOP SECRET—FOR YOUR EYES ONLY

It has come to my attention that approximately 100 Neo-Nazis presented themselves waving anti-Semitic signs and Nazi swastika and SS flags outside the “Turning Point USA Student Action Summit Conference” held in Tampa, Florida.

Since Florida is my home state, this protest or attempt to gather recruits or publicity stunt seemed a little too close to home.

And since Tampa is a hop, skip and a jump across Alligator Alley to Lauderdale, I have taken particular interest in this matter.

I was disturbed but not surprised to learn that former President Trump spoke at the aforementioned conference.

It seems that Trump is a shtick of dreck for these horseflies.

These Neo-Nazi groups distributed flyers, one of which said “every single aspect of abortion is Jewish.”

The flyers also said they were distributed by the “Goyim Defense League”, which the Anti-Defamation League describes as an extremist terrorist organization that was responsible for at least 74 anti-semitic propaganda incidents in 2021.

But one of the waved signs caught my particular attention.

It read, “DA GOYIM KNOW.”

WTF, do they know?

Are these mamzurs studying Yiddish?

And why?

Has a renegade rabbi sold us out by teaching Yiddish to these creeps?

Have these antisemitten learned Yiddish online?

What else do these goyim know?

For instance, have these bastards learned about our top secret programs.

Such as:

Our Space Laser Beam Neo-Nazi Schmeckel Emasculation Program or

Our Neo-Nazi vaccination sterilization kits or

G-d Forbid, our Operation Photo, Catch and Release:

Just in case you have forgotten, here’s a simplified version of Operation Photo, Catch and Release operational procedure guide:

Step 1. The ADL or another Jewish eleemosynary institution hire professional photographers/ investigators.

Step 2. These photographers/investigators shot the faces of all unmasked Neo-Nazis attending Tampa-type rallies.

Step 3. The info is collected and a name/face database is created.

Step 4. Individualized database info is then posted on or in Neo-Nazi’s employer’s, churches’ and families’ websites or mailboxes. All gathered info is provided to the FBI.

Since it appears this scum may be reading our coded messages in Yiddish, I am recommending that we consider using another language on all confidential memorandums.

Please destroy this memo after reading.

About the Author
Florida's Jewish short-story writer, speaker, film producer and retired attorney. He has authored, "A Hebraic Obsession", "The Hanukkah Bunny" and "The Greatest Gift." He produced an award-winning short film entitled, "The Stairs". Movie can be viewed on my TOI blog. Mort was a correspondent for the Fort Lauderdale Sun Sentinel Jewish Journal. He has recently taken on the post of president of the South Florida Writers Association.
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