Popular Anecdotes, Unpopular Opinions
An intimate birthday party for a distantly related cousin. To my left at the table, a family member, mother of three, from a kibbutz bordering on Sderot, as in “that’s rather close to Gaza.” The kibbutz was saved from terrorists on October 7, a story of its own. But my relatives spent that day, without electricity in their home shelter for over 12 hours until able to flee to Ashkelon to a set of grandparents. Officially, they were evacuated like their entire kibbutz until March 2024. The family of five lived in two different hotel rooms in two different cities during that time. They visited us a few months after the evacuation. We invited our granddaughters who had visited the kibbutz and played with the evacuated kids in their home and pool in the summer of 2023.
At the birthday dinner, the mother and I laughed and hugged and talked and listened. She told me how she sought help, ultimately finding the strength to ask for it while drowning in feelings of guilt – feeling less than deserving of the right to struggle with the experiences of that day. She didn’t lose a family member. She didn’t lose a close friend. She just spent a terrifying day in a shelter. Why should she be struggling?
She shared details of psychosomatic phenomena that shielded the difficulties her youngest son, then in third grade, kept to himself for months. His art teacher and a child he knew were murdered that day.
Her husband overheard her telling me hotel rooms are a trigger, reminiscent of the evacuation accommodations that were inseparable from the October 7 events and subsequent war in Gaza. He has the same experience as his wife, even at a luxury hotel abroad on a business trip – becomes three sleepless nights.
When things are done for your safety, there’s usual call for concern. The kibbutzim always had community defense squads to protect them from enemy infiltration. Long before October 7, they had routine simulation exercises. The IDF Home Front Command conducts similar exercises in cities. In the latter case, the mayor’s office advises residents of a pending exercise, and what will happen should a real attack occur at the time. Last week, at my relative’s kibbutz, there was a simulation exercise. Adults were notified. My relative’s teenage daughter came home in a panic after seeing a neighbor with a bullet proof vest and other gear exiting underground space. Her mother assured her it was a simulation. The daughter made it clear that next time she needs to be told in advance.
By the next morning, the media carried news of four IDF soldiers hit by the precision of an explosive drone in southern Lebanon just after midnight. It’s Friday. We’re headed for the supermarket. Haim’s nephew and wife visiting from abroad mean we are planning for our Friday night family dinner with more excitement than usual. Haim is examining labels in the dairy aisle. I check my phone only to see news that one of the four soldiers submitted to his wounds, and another soldier was since injured. I update Haim. A woman with her back to us turns around, not quite trembling, asking if the news mentions the unit the fallen soldier is from. “Battalion 52.” She sighs with relief and contracts, as I ask if she’s ok, and she responds that she doesn’t have anyone in that battalion. We continue our shopping and I wonder, is she worried about her son, or a granddaughter, maybe a nephew or niece.
Relatives. Strangers. Others. Trauma. Triggers. Birthday parties and family dinners on Friday night.
In one WhatsApp group, a colleague asks if anyone on the team can help with a specific request from a family with three little girls who lost their father on October 7.
A member of another WhatsApp group dedicated to writing and sharing posts promoting peace, shares a tweet on X – unpopular opinion. Considering the writer, Tom Zandman, I’m almost certain I’ll identify with the tweet. It opens with crass language about government ministers not attending funerals of fallen soldiers or calling their parents. Once unimaginable in Israel. It proceeds to say: “I care about soldiers being sent on suicidal tasks, lacking logic or purpose, on foreign soil, to evacuate civilians from their villages [in Lebanon] and demolish their homes, to kill and then die, to conquer more and more territory, in a war in which there is no connection between the war and security and defense. A little more serious in my eyes.”
An unpopular opinion? Becoming an undeniable opinion. Not because we shouldn’t defend ourselves.
Harriet Gimpel – June 21, 2026
